Transcript

Intro Clip

Bless me, Father, for I have just killed quite a few men. No shit. From what I hear, you cleaned out the entire Tarasco bar. Nice job, asshole. Now you're gonna have every hitman in Coahuila looking for you. Things got out of hand. Couldn't avoid it. But I told you no more bloodbaths. I told you. Bucho is the last one. After him, I'm finished. No, I'm finished. They killed the woman you loved. Okay, then they shot through your hand, 2 points. Hey, wake up. There is no payback for that. Walk away. Trust me, this is one you're not going to want to see through to the end. What do you mean? Let's just say I've done some checking around and Butcho is not someone you want to mess with. Trust me on this. I cannot live without Butch. You don't expect to live much longer? Fine. I do. Seriously, you need any more help? Don't call me. Call your friends, Camper and Kino. They're crazy anyway. No, no, no, but I should be able to count on you. You. Those days are gone. Wait, hey. Come on. Good luck. Don't get shot.

Steve

It's 2 Dads 1 Movie. It's the podcast where 2 middle-aged dads sit around and shoot the shit about the movies of the '80s and '90s. Here are your hosts, Steve Paulo Hello everybody, welcome to another episode of 2 Dads 1 Movie. I'm Steve.

Nic

And I'm Nic.

Steve

And today we are talking about the 1995 action classic Desperado from Robert Rodriguez, who was one of these kind of early to mid-'90s auteurs that kind of came out. We saw last week, we watched Clerks from Kevin Smith, which is very similarly kind of that thing. And of course, there's Quentin Tarantino and Richard Linklater, and I'm sure plenty that I'm forgetting. Um, but yeah, this was, this was Rodriguez's kind of studio debut.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

After doing El Mariachi in '93. So, uh, this was for 2 Dads 2 Decades. So this was our '95 pick, and Nic, you picked it for us. So tell us a little bit about your history with Desperado.

Nic

Yeah, uh, this one caught me at the right time, I think, uh, catching it, you know, when we're talking about all these movies, blockbuster era, right? And so it came out in '95. I, I definitely didn't see it in the theater, but saw it like as it was released on video, and it was definitely one of those, dude, look how cool this is.

Steve

It's great.

Nic

He's got 2 guns at once. Like, this is part of the 2 guns at once craze that we've really never left.

Steve

Yeah, right.

Nic

And, uh, and it just felt so cool and it felt so different. Like, there was just a real mood to it at the time, and I thought, oh man, this is what cool guys do. This is how— look at this chick. Yeah, that's because he's so cool and all that stuff. Um, and, and I haven't watched it since then, and I haven't revisited the movie, so I thought it'd be fun to talk about and see, like, is it still cool? Does it still, you know, or does it seem stupid? Because sometimes you watch these things, you're like, oh my God, I can't believe I thought— like, Roondog Saints or something, like stuff that it's like, oh Jesus. So, uh, yeah, and I thought this one would be fun to chat about. And we haven't seen, you know, getting— like you said, getting into some of these very important directors of the era. Like, it's good to get some Robert Rodriguez in the mix because I don't think we're gonna do Spy Kids.

Steve

No, no. But I mean, From Dusk Till Dawn is a likely candidate, right? And but in a lot of, a lot of Rodriguez's great stuff too was in the early 2000s. You know, I think that's when like Planet Terror was. And obviously then the, this Desperado is the second film in the El Mariachi trilogy, right? El Mariachi '93. This was '95. And then Once Upon a Time in Mexico with Ben Darius and Johnny Depp was in like, I think '03 or something. So not, not in our categorization of films we'll cover, but this was just something to know that this was, this had both a prequel and a sequel. So yeah, that's cool. I, for my part, I saw El Mariachi in college when I was an insufferable film student.

Nic

Nice.

Steve

And had to go back and watch like all the, you know, I mean, I was already really well familiar with like Tarantino and Smith and Linklater and was like, well, I got to, you know, this is like, this is, this is the group that is mimicked by or is a mirror of the 1970s when like Spielberg, Scorsese, Coppola, and De Palma were all kind of coming out and like, you know, this wave of American auteurs. Yeah. And I don't— I think history has borne out that no, Tarantino, Rodriguez, and Smith and Linklater were not Scorsese, Spielberg, you know, De Palma, and Coppola. But I mean, I mean, you know, Tarantino certainly has had—.

Nic

Yeah, I mean, a run of really good stuff.

Steve

Yeah, for sure, for sure. But maybe not quite to that level. So yeah, so I saw El Mariachi. I never saw Desperado, and I'm not even really sure why. It just kind of never caught me. I wasn't as big a fan of El Mariachi as I was of like Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction. So I think I just kind of gravitated in this style of like '90s American cinema. I think I just was pulled more towards Tarantino than Rodriguez, you know. Yeah, so I thought it'd be really I'm, you know, happy to see it. Um, have not seen Mariachi since college, so I really don't have a lot of frame of reference. A lot of this felt very familiar. Yeah. Uh, I don't know as much if like exact— I kind of want to go back and watch Mariachi now because I don't know if it's like exact set pieces were taken or if it was just the feel of a tragedy has occurred, he's hunting down the killers, you know, kind of thing. Because the Mariachi, there's the, there's the, there's the mistaken identity part of it as well. So there's, it's like a different story, but a lot of this felt very similar. To that movie.

Nic

Yeah, I mean, it is just generally— we'll get into it, but it's kind of hard to tell like what's a flashback and what's not because it's generally the same kind of shit happening, right?

Steve

Yeah, for sure.

Nic

Um, yeah. All right, good. I'm excited to chat then and excited that you got to see it finally.

Steve

Yes, yes, me too. Let's jump into the facts on Desperado. All right, the film Desperado was released on August 25th, 1995 with an R rating and a running time of 104 minutes. It was written and directed by Robert Rodriguez. It stars Antonio Banderas, Salma Hayek, and Joaquín Dalmaida. On Rotten Tomatoes, it scored 71%. On IMDb, a 7.1, both respectable scores. It gets a thumbs up from Gene Siskel, but a thumbs down from Roger Ebert. Let's see, awards. It didn't win any that I could find, or at least that were kind of worth mentioning, but it did get nominated for 2 1996 MTV Movie Awards, which is one that we do pay attention to fairly often. Antonio Banderas was nominated for Most Desirable Male. He lost to Brad Pitt in Seven, which I get it. Total argument. Easy argument to make.

Nic

Yeah, romantic movies.

Steve

See, that's what I'm getting at. Yeah, they're both hotties, whatever. They're handsome, good-looking, right? So I totally get the idea like, well, is it Pitt or Banderas? Like in a vacuum, that's a great argument to have, right? But Banderas in this movie versus Pitt in Seven is mind-blowing. It's crazy because Banderas is like playing the sexiest version of Antonio Banderas in this movie. And Brad Pitt is not in Seven. So, but it gets better because this film was also nominated for Best Kiss, obviously between Banderas and Salma Hayek.

Nic

Okay.

Steve

But the winning kiss was from the movie Species when Natasha Henstridge pops her tongue back through the back of the guy's skull. That won Best Kiss that year.

Nic

So respect to the voters, honestly. I mean, that's what the MTV Awards are for, right?

Steve

Fair, fair. And it was maybe a more impactful kiss. I suppose it was certainly impactful for the character whose brain was then on the floor.

Nic

But at least Best is like, you can translate that however. Best kiss could be the coolest. So that's fine. But the most desirable male is very clear. And that's so weird.

Steve

And so separate. Those awards at the time also had— they would have most desirable male, most desirable female, and then best male performance, best female performance, where they were doing more of the let's reward the acting versus just like, hey, that's a hottie, right? Kind of thing. Yeah. Hit and Seven. I don't know, man. That is some wild shit. I also don't know how those— I never like voted. I don't know if it was like a Teen Choice type thing where people voted on the MTV Awards. I never did growing up, so I don't know.

Nic

I think it might've been a phone vote thing, but—.

Steve

Yeah, where you got a dollar for the first minute, you know? Right, right. All right, for this movie, Robert Rodriguez had a budget of $7 million, almost exactly 1,000 times more than what he spent to make El Mariachi, which was made for just about 7 grand.

Nic

Wow.

Steve

And at the box office, it pulled in $25.4 million, 3.6 times what it cost, a bona fide hit, no denying it. So those are the facts. Desperado. And Nick, you brought this to the table, so why don't you kick off? How does this movie open?

Nic

What are we looking at? So, so we get a cold open here. Yes, and we love a cold open. Really good, one of our favorite things. Um, and we've got, uh, Steve Buscemi's character who walks into this bar, and it's this very, you know, classic like Wild West, like dirty, dusty, rough and tumble kind of bar. And he stomps out his cig and he gets up, and he's, he's very, um He doesn't belong there. He very clearly doesn't belong there. And he is not concerned really about what these guys think of him or anything. Like, he's very confident and stuff. They're kind of put off by him. But he goes in and starts telling this story and he's, you know, like, I'm actually lucky to be alive and starts telling this whole story about at this other bar he was in, in another town, the biggest Mexican I've ever seen walks in. And, you know, his face is always in the dark and he's very mysterious. And then just you know, slaughters everyone. He's looking for this guy named Bucho, and he, and he kills everyone, right? And, and it's kind of cool as he's telling the story, we get little shots of him, you know, with these ridiculous guns. The guns that they— that he has are very nice. It's like there's almost a steampunk element to like how big that stuff is.

Steve

There's like a— it looks like a pistol shotgun with a like— yeah, the kind of barrel. Yeah, just crazy work. I love— I love Buscemi's character here, which by By the way, I had to look it up because I didn't think anyone ever referred to him by name in the movie, but he's credited as— the character's credited as the name Buscemi, which is interesting. I'm not really sure if Rodriguez has never named him or what, but like, but, but that's the character name officially. Um, but he is— he walks in and he puts his cigarette out on the floor and he stomps it out for like 30 seconds. Like he's just grinding it into the floor and it's attracting all this attention because it's like, you know, whatever. And it's— he's so good at grabbing the entire bar's attention. 'Cause he goes up to the bar and he's talking to Cheech Marin, who's playing the bartender, who's credited as Short Bartender, which I'm sure he appreciated. But, you know, so he starts telling the story. And, you know, initially these guys are like, you know, fuck this gringo. They're looking at him like, might as well slit this guy's throat. Like, look at him, right? Whatever. But he starts telling the story and they want to know what he looks like, right? This guy that he's describing. Well, what did he look like? What does he— and he's like, did you see his face? Like, no. I saw his eyes. You know, and it's like really good stuff. And every once in a while he goes, you know, this place is filled with just the worst pieces of shit, real world-class turds. And then he looks and goes, Not like you find gentlemen here.

Nic

Class actually have in this bar. I did love the world-class turds.

Steve

Yeah, world-class turds. That's a great line. That is good shit. Yeah.

Nic

And when he's telling the story is basically that El Mariachi comes in, he kills everyone in the bar, and at the end walks up to the bartender and he paid and left. And Cheech Marin's like, hey, so the bartender lives, eh? It's like, not so fast. And then, you know, of course in the story the bartender gets shot in the head.

Steve

Right.

Nic

Um, really funny. Uh, so yeah, so we end up with him scaring the shit out of all these people because he knows that they're, you know, Bucho, this might be one of his controlled areas, and he's getting the word out and everything. So these guys are fucking spooked and they're just like, yeah, I'll give you beer, like you can do it for free if you tell me what he looked like.

Steve

Exactly.

Nic

He's like, you know what, man, I'm out of here. I think he's headed this way.

Steve

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Nic

So really cool way to open the movie.

Steve

Absolutely. And then we get the, the, uh, the credits kind role after this, but it's like clear in a moment, like I'm just gonna jump ahead a second, but he's like on a fishing expedition. You know, he's there to see, you know, does, is this a Bucho-aligned bar?

Nic

How do they react to me saying that name?

Steve

'Cause he's right, as soon as he said that name, that's when everybody turned. That's when everybody went from fuck this gringo to, oh, we better pay attention to what this guy's saying 'cause this sounds important, right? And of course, El Mariachi himself is a legend. It's, you know, he's a bit of a Baba Yaga, boogeyman, John Wick kind of thing going on. Among the drug cartels in Mexico at the time, right? That's the idea here. But part of the opening credits then is our hero, El Mariachi, singing in a mariachi band, right? And kind of whatever. And I recognized the songs like, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay, mi amor. And I was like, oh cool, this song. And I had no idea this song was written by Antonio Banderas and Los Lobos for this movie. Oh, that's funny. It's called Canción del Mariachi, and it was written by Banderas as a co-writing credit with Los Lobos. And it was made for this song. And to me, I thought this was like a classically historic mariachi tune or something. Not that I'm super familiar with mariachi music, just to be totally clear, but it's just something that I'd heard so many times.

Nic

Yeah, it sounded, I mean, it's very well done.

Steve

Sounds classic.

Nic

It really does.

Steve

It's a really great song. But in this dream sequence, he's playing, and then he sees a guy start to mess around with a girl over on the side of the bar and pull a knife on her. And he basically walks across the bar, cool as shit. You're talking about being so cool.

Nic

Guitar solos his way over to this guy.

Steve

And that wonderful sort of, you know, Tejano Mexican and Spanish sort of tinkly guitar sound. It's so cool. And he just slams the guitar like neck and head against this guy's face. Everybody cheers. And then I love to— he gets back to the other two, his little trio, and, uh, he kind of wipes off the, the head of the guitar. There's so much like very cartoonish bloodletting in this movie, which is great. Like, it fits the theme and the sort of style significantly. And again, another thing I think that lines Rodriguez up with a person who obviously was a close personal friend of his, Quentin Tarantino. The sort of, you know, the way blood spurts in this every once in a while made me think immediately of like Kill Bill. Yeah, it was very, very that style of like the cartoonish bloodletting.

Nic

Definitely. And, and this bar, uh, that they're— it's like a dream sequence that they're performing in— is— does not look anything like the bar that Boucher was just in, right? This looks almost like a bar that, uh, Dalton would have been working in for 6 months because it's been cleaned up and there's neon lights and all this stuff and everything. But after he takes this guy out and they finish their performance, then we get like what sounds like a slow clap, but it's a guy like packing his cigarette pack. And he is the least intimidating looking guy I've ever seen. I mean, I was just like, this fucking pussy, really? Like, come on.

Steve

So it's the villain from El Mariachi, the same actor. And, and it's— you got to think about who the actors that would have been available to Robert Rodriguez in Texas in 1992 for 7 grand for a whole movie, right? So, but it is the same guy.

Nic

What could he put the people— because I think El Mariachi is one of his friends later on. Uh, Kino are also right from the first So yeah, but he comes in and he does what— there's a few moves in this movie that I haven't seen in other things that really just, uh, absolutely tickle me. I like him striking a match on his henchman's face to light his cigar really good, or to light his cigarette. Yep. Um, yeah, so what he ends up doing right before he wakes up from this dream sequence is he shoots Banderas in the hand, right? He flashes to this guy has killed his woman basically, and he shoots him in the hand, right?

Steve

That's sort of the punishment he, he was able to, you know, like he can't play guitar anymore because he's being punished by being shot in the hand, not just killed, kind of thing. So yeah, so, and then, you know, he kind of wakes up. This has been a dream. He's sort of— because he's remembering back and he wakes up, and then Buscemi, you know, knocks on the door. And I love the, you know, the exchange, like, who is it? He's got the gun. It's the only friend you've got. Which is like good, good, good character work in one line for Buscemi there. But basically tells him, I've found the right bar. Yeah, like, this was definitely the right part. They reacted.

Nic

Buscemi, the way that he is, it's so much more effective to have him in there than a guy who maybe seemed more like Texan or someone who like lived in Mexico. Like, he's so out of place. His voice is so specific. Like, it's, it's really great to have him in.

Steve

Absolutely. Yeah, he's great.

Nic

Yeah, so, so he's like, you know, walking to the next city. That—.

Steve

Yep.

Nic

And he's on his way. We've got Bucho now. We kind of flash over to Bucho, and Bucho's like the cartel boss type dude.

Steve

Yeah, yeah. This is Joaquim Dalmeda, the other kind of— yeah, star, I guess.

Nic

Yeah, he kind of has like the Ellis from Die Hard look a little bit, like that kind of beard but not kept too long, kind of cool guy look. And, uh, another thing that I love here is you got the bad guys, you gotta have your henchmen practice on each other in a very rudimentary fighting pit.

Steve

Yes. So he's got like spikes and shit all over.

Nic

He's running like henchman auditions here in the fighting pit and ends up being like, oh hey, we got this new kid, you know, he's training against one of our guys. Like, oh, that guy sucks, put him against our best guy. If you can beat him, he's in. And then there's just kind of a weird fight scene where he's getting the absolute shit beaten out of him.

Steve

Bad. Yeah.

Nic

He's not really hitting back at all. He gets his shin broken in a really brutal way.

Steve

It looks like— yeah, like a compound crack in half, right? Completely.

Nic

And then somehow does a jump kick that kills the other guy, right?

Steve

Like with the broken leg.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

Like the broken leg, you get a little warm up from whipping it. Yeah. It's like a little whip action. That loose shin that's sort of floating in space becomes like, you know, the end of a mace. Or, or a, you know, ball and chain kind of thing. And he smacks him. I don't know if he actually killed the other guy, but he does say like, well, there goes Costas, or whatever that guy— Christo, whatever the guy's name was.

Nic

I feel like anytime somebody has blood come out of their mouth and then they fall on the ground, that's a dead person as far as cinema goes.

Steve

Yeah, that certainly happened to, uh, who's— we got Rocky IV, we got Menace to Society, we got a lot of bleeding mouths and dead people. That's true. Um, yeah.

Nic

Um, and then as if this movie didn't have enough for me and us and everyone, we get our first scene of Danny Trejo.

Steve

Yes.

Nic

Uh, he looks cool as shit. I mean, they, they made him— I love the decision to give him the throwing knives and like the little belt to hold them and everything. Just looks so cool. But it shows him dialing a payphone using a knife to dial the buttons. Fucking awesome. I love that so much.

Steve

It's good stuff.

Intro Clip

He looks—.

Steve

I feel like he looks weird with short hair though. Like almost everything I remember seeing Danny Trejo in, you know, later in the '90s, when we've seen him in a couple things already, he's got longer hair. And to me that's like the classic Trejo look, is sort of at least shoulder length hair. Here he's got a tight haircut, like it's, it's a tight up kind of haircut, and I'm just like, he doesn't look as menacing. I mean, he's still Danny Trejo, so he still looks badass as fuck, like don't get me wrong. Yeah, but it's like there was something about his hair that I went, that's a little too like Supercuts. It doesn't quite work for me like as much as a long hair does.

Nic

Do you think Banderas had like a clause where he's like, I'm the only cool long hair guy in this?

Steve

Maybe, but you know, they could have gotten around that by not letting Trejo ponytail it, because I really do think that's one of the ways Banderas looks awesome is when he's got the ponytail going.

Nic

He's one of the few dudes, the ponytail, and then some of the hair is kind of falling out of the ponytail, which by the way, also be the coolest way to do it.

Steve

Also the classic look of every girl I had a crush on in middle school and high school back in the '90s, for sure. Ponytail with that little bit hanging out.

Nic

It's so good.

Steve

This is— this would have been a much more confusing movie for me to see during puberty, I got to be honest with you. Yeah.

Nic

Uh, so we have a couple instances in this movie because it doesn't say exactly where in Mexico it is, it's just generally Mex—.

Steve

Well, they use, they use a name for the town, but it, but it's not clear where.

Nic

Giving like—.

Steve

Exactly.

Nic

As we've discussed before, what I need is the map with like the illustration of the plane flying to the place. Um, and there's these random kind of like spring break college kid seeming people that are in the town, and it's like the shittiest bar in the world. And they're just like, your service here is terrible. And she's yelling at Cheech Marin and everything. She's like, and your beer tastes like piss, as she's walking out. And then we get Cheech and the other guy saying, that's because we piss in it.

Steve

That's not all. It was funny because they did pay, but it almost looked like for a moment these girls are gonna get shot. Like, you know, like it really was menacing.

Nic

It is funny, the boldness of like— everyone is on eggshells constantly and everyone's so scared of the cartels except for these entitled-ass kids who are like, uh, I didn't get everything exactly the way I wanted.

Steve

The way she starts it is, I used to work in a bar, so I get it, but it's like, Jesus, kid.

Nic

Oh my God.

Steve

And then we get another couple people show up in the same bar. We get Quentin Tarantino and a buddy of his who's missing significant numbers of teeth, um, and they, uh, order some beers. And you know, it was funny when Buscemi first came in, he said, can I get a beer? And Cheech is like, all I got is piss-warm chango.

Nic

Chango, which is a great fake beer name. You know, it sounds awesome.

Steve

Uh, but these guys order the beer as well, and then, and then they each give— hand over like what look like business cards, like some kind of identifying information. And, and, uh, the guy who's with Cheech starts making a phone call. So they get the beers and they both are like, this is disgusting, which is a great juxtaposition to Buscemi, who very smoothly, very like casually drank his beer. Yeah. And Tarantino is like, this is fucking—.

Nic

It is funny how they both take a big gulp and like before swallowing are both looking at each other like, oh my God, are we really gonna swallow this shit?

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

Uh, and then we get a Tarantino— and this is like the most Tarantino-ish part of the movie is him himself in it. Yes, because like his movies are very like snappy dialogue kind of shit, and, and Rodriguez's style is much more stylized visual. Yep, kind of stuff, right?

Intro Clip

Sure.

Nic

But the Tarantino character is like a Tarantino character here, and he comes in and it's a great scene in the movie, honestly. Yeah, I really like this. And I don't— looking at Quentin Tarantino does not please me. I don't get warm fuzzy feelings when I see him, but I think he's good in this, and I like the way he tells the story. So he tells the story joke basically about, you know, this guy, uh, bets that he can't piss all the way across the bar into a glass without spilling a drop, and it turns out he pisses all over the place because he's made this other bet. But I love where he's telling the story and he's like, and the bartender's laughing, there's piss going all over the place, hahaha, piss dripping down his face, hahaha. I, I really enjoy that type of storytelling.

Steve

Tarantino is a pretty underrated actor when he's playing this kind of guy. And, and he does— here's the thing, I feel like he's an underrated actor when he, when he's in his zone and probably we understand properly what his range is. His range is very narrow, but when he's playing that guy, whether it's this character, it's his character from Pulp, you know, Jimmy from Pulp Fiction is like kind of the same guy when he's playing this guy. He's, I think, a lot of fun to watch. And I don't like the man himself has got all kinds of fucking demons and shit that I don't want to get into. But like as a screen presence, I like him in this. I like him in From Dusk Till Dawn. I like him in Pulp Fiction. Like when he's on screen and he's in that narrow range. He's a lot of fun.

Nic

He has to be kind of like an annoying guy that nobody wants a little bit to be there.

Steve

Yep, absolutely.

Nic

And that's his wheelhouse.

Steve

Yeah, he nailed it.

Nic

Yeah, so it's great. So he tells this joke and the guys like it, and then Cheech pulls out a gun and shoots the guy next to Tarantino.

Steve

Yeah, like, he didn't check.

Nic

He's your friend, he didn't check out. And moves the gun right to his face. He's like, you checked out just fine, you know? And then Quentin does the thing immediately where he's like Oh, actually, you know, good, good job. Actually, I, I'm glad you did that. I just met this guy.

Steve

It's good to see that your system works. So you see, like, it's better for me. Meantime, the dude's brain splatter, right, is on the side of his face. He's kind of like, oh, okay. So they take him in the back. He's obviously there for a purpose, and they take him back. And while he's in the back, El Mariachi shows up to the bar and is carrying his guitar case. Yeah. And that's, of course, was part, you know, I did notice actually that Uh, when Buscemi told the story about him at the other bar, he didn't say guitar case. He said something like a briefcase and put it down, whatever.

Nic

Right.

Steve

And, but it's clear that this is the legend that they're all aware of is the, is the Mariachi, the man with the guitar case full of guns kind of thing. Right. So they're, they're pulling guns on him, like whatever. And finally we got to check your case. We're going to check your case. So they open it and it's a guitar. At first it looks fine and they're kind of like, oh, it's just a guitar. It's okay. But then turns out it's not a guitar. That's sort of a, right. It's like a false guitar that opens up and it's all this crazy wild shit underneath, you know, just like in the sort of storytelling sequence. And this is when all hell breaks loose in this bar.

Nic

Yes.

Steve

And we get one of the first of maybe 3 or 4 like significant gunfight scenes. Actually, I guess the second, because in Buscemi's story we got—.

Nic

Right, right.

Steve

But this is like a really concentrated sort of like gunplay scene now.

Nic

And we've got double guns, you know, so El Mariachi is like, of course you can produce them from your sleeve.

Steve

Yes.

Nic

You're cool enough.

Steve

Very cool.

Nic

All you got to do is kind of flick your fingers and the guns pop conveniently right into your hand. And then the dudes that are sitting in the bar at this table, all of a sudden it's just all the furniture's flipped and then they all have guns and shot— like, there's not a single non-henchman in this bar.

Steve

Correct. And they're all carrying like Uzis with suppressors on them or something. It's really wild looking guns. Again, big.

Nic

If you're, if you're a drug cartel, you'd probably do better financially to buy a bunch of the same type of gun in bulk.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And it seems like they're very— it's like GI Joe where it's just like, yeah, just wear whatever clothes. You know, even though we're supposed to be an army, like, yeah, just whatever gun you want. Uh, one thing real quick about the secret room.

Steve

Yes.

Nic

Oh yeah.

Steve

Oh God.

Nic

So when they go in the secret room in the bar, they're walking and looking at like kind of increasingly gross toilet stalls.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And then they finally open one and it's just absolute disgusting, you know, worst toilet in Scotland from Trainspotting. Just like splatter and disgusting. And then the secret door is there.

Intro Clip

Yeah.

Nic

But it reminds me of, and it seems like, oh, they probably use real shit there to keep people away, right?

Steve

Yeah, in good camouflage.

Nic

In Breaking Bad, there's a part where they have to basically smuggle Walter White in and out of a building without people seeing him, and they're doing it by putting him in a laundry bin, right? So it's like, get in the laundry bin, we throw stuff on top of you and bring him inside. And one of the funniest things is he comes out, uh, when they get inside, and he's like, does the laundry have to be dirty? It's like, yeah, for authenticity it does. And just for authenticity It has to be real doo-doo on the walls. Yeah, absolutely. This toilet. So yeah, so we're in our shootout and this shootout is great.

Steve

Good stuff.

Nic

El Mariachi is like, as he shoots, flicking his wrists forward, which is one of my favorite things.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

As if it's like, this bullet's not coming out fast enough. I need to also fling it at you.

Steve

I mean, if you are pulling a trigger while pushing your hand forward, that is a small amount more—.

Nic

You're offsetting the recoil too. There you go.

Steve

Yeah, yeah.

Nic

And man, so we get all these great things. At one point there's a dude who's like ducking behind the bar and he's under the ceiling fan. Oh yeah, Mariachi shoots the ceiling fan and it comes down and like just knocks the guy out. But then when he goes and sees the guy laying on the ground, the fan's still going, just kind of like slapping him in the face. It's really good.

Steve

Yeah, and we get a great like, uh, a moment that actually made me think of— unfortunately, uh, well, it kind of is like a scene in Die Hard, uh, when he shoots up through the conference table. Yeah, right. But Mariachi has to like kick himself back and slide back along the floor to shoot a guy on the— up on the, uh, uh, bar that's coming at him. That's a really— that's, I feel like, one of the classic stills from this movie, is him on his back, the two guns up. Very cool.

Nic

Yeah. And, uh, he ends up— there's only kind of one guy left, and they're both, uh, going at each other, but they're both picking up empty guns. And that's— this is a very creative, great, uh, sequence, I think, in this movie.

Steve

That guy came from the back. He was like in the back dealing with money with Tarantino and the other guy that's there. Well, when all hell broke loose The other guy who was like Cheech Marin's right-hand man kills Tarantino because he thinks he's part of what's going on. Like, hey, how convenient, you know, that this guy shows up right when you do. Yeah. And the other guy goes out to like see if he can help, I guess, basically. And yeah, they're like— they both unload what they've got on each other, never hitting each other, which is something we should mention. Not since Commando have we seen a movie where a man can just stand in front of a bunch of oncoming fire. Yeah. And just never get hit. It's really Schwarzenegger level.

Nic

It's amazing how he makes those bullets miss.

Steve

Yeah. But yeah, once they're both out, they get a moment where they both reach for a pair of guns and are just at each other's face and click, click, you know, nothing left. And yeah, they're just like running through the room trying to grab a gun. So, and my first thought was like, dude, I would've just take the Uzi you're holding, which probably weighs like 15 pounds or whatever. Just bash the guy in the face. Like, come on. This is like when you throw your gun at Superman, you gotta do something. Seriously.

Nic

I know it was, it was great. Like the way that they were both reacting to each other and moving so slow. And then finally El Mariachi was just like, fuck it. And snaps the guy's neck.

Steve

That's right.

Nic

Um, so great scene.

Steve

He leaves the bar.

Nic

There's a sign, uh, on the wall that says members and non-members only.

Steve

I love this sign. I saw that too. That was really great.

Nic

Yes, my favorite kind of jacket too.

Steve

Oh yeah. Um, yeah.

Nic

Um, so, uh, now we see Salma Hayek's character, right?

Steve

She's like across the street. She's just kind of walking down the street as Mariachi comes out of the bar and is heading down. But then the guy who, again, was sort of like Chicha's right-hand guy has followed him out, and he's apparently got a couple of guns on him, and he's kind of following Mariachi, you know, running down the street. Because I know we notice he passes Trejo, but Trejo doesn't like react. He's just kind of watching stuff. And as he gets approached, Mariachi turns around to sort of like knock Salma Hayek to the ground to get her out of harm's way. Yeah. And it's like wrestling briefly with the guy, uh, and there's like gunfire, whatever. And Salma Hayek's okay, but, uh, he took a shot in the shoulder, I think, right? Yeah, Mariachi takes a shot in the shoulder. But ends up killing the other guy with his own guns, kind of turns them back on him and pow, you know, and then—.

Nic

And I think that scene doesn't even show the guy getting shot. It's a shot of Mariachi kind of on top of the guy forcing both guns and hits him with both in the head at the same time. And just the blood hits quite a bit.

Steve

Yeah, again, cartoonish.

Nic

Very, yes, very cartoonish. Um, when it very first showed Salma Hayek too, she was walking across the street and these two cars crashed because they were— everyone was staring at her.

Steve

It's gorgeous.

Nic

Yeah, yeah, very nice. Uh, so El Mariachi left a note at the bar, just says, looking for Bucho M, right?

Steve

Right.

Nic

So yeah, they know, uh, they know he's around.

Steve

Yes. And so he's— so now Bucho has showed up to the bar to kind of, you know, survey the damage, and his right-hand man is there, and, and they're kind of like, you know, oh man, like the Mariachi's, uh, uh, is, you know, he's basically still telling me it's a myth, it's a legend, like this is not, you know, he's like, look, he's here, he knows I'm here, you know, kind of thing. And more tourists come in briefly, apparently not immediately turning around upon seeing the piles of dead bodies, right? Or— and the blood all over the floor, you know, all this stuff. But, you know, he basically tells them to get the fuck out and they do. And again, another lucky group of tourists who are not just getting killed by the cartels.

Nic

People have been killed for much less. Oh my God.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

So, so Selma and her name's Carolina.

Steve

Carolina. Yep.

Nic

Carolina is doing surgery.

Steve

Yes.

Nic

On El Mariachi, which is Good, you know, next best thing to self-surgery is having like a hot chick do it for you, right?

Steve

Especially one who's no medical experience, whatever, just reading out of a textbook.

Nic

Yeah, just— and honestly, that's all you need to do. I mean, doctors act like, oh, it's important that I know all this stuff by heart. Just get a textbook, you'll be fine. Um, she uses a cigarette, a lit cigarette, to cauterize the wound, which seems like the most painful because it went into a bullet hole.

Steve

A few things. One, this is where the actual medical training would be helpful because now that wound is clearly infected. There's no way that that's not a problem for the wound itself. And then, yeah, the cauterization kind of like needs to be like on the sewn-up part, or, you know, or as big as, you know, the heat applied needs to be as big as the wound so that it all cauterizes. This is really just her seemingly playing with his wound. Right.

Nic

I just want to make sure there's ash inside.

Steve

Yeah, that's a great idea. And then he goes to sip water or to take pills and sip water, and she doesn't tell him until after he's brought it to his mouth that that's hot water. That she was using for the surgery or whatever. And he, you know, it's like probably like near boiling. Yeah, really hot. Oh my God.

Nic

Uh, but she stitched him up, you know, he's, uh, and he's recovering.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

Um, we're back at the bar and Bucho's now arrived and he sees the aftermath, all the bodies. And there's one dude who's just like lifting full bodies and chucking into a pile. And then another guy doing the least effective mop job I've ever seen in my life.

Steve

Well, there's a lot of—.

Nic

Mopping doesn't work.

Steve

Yeah, in general.

Nic

I mean, or it's just such a long-term thing. Like, whenever you see it, it's not satisfying. Like, yeah, you'll see those infomercials where it's like, you know, some lint roller or cleaner and it gets so clean and it's so satisfying to watch. Mopping blood is the exact opposite of that. You're just wiping it around the floor.

Steve

Well, they didn't have a Shop-Vac. Yeah, they didn't have Swiffer Wet Jets back then, so they didn't have the little pad to soak it up.

Nic

Well, Desperado 3 is going to be brought to us by Swiffer Wet Jet.

Steve

So yeah, so they're, uh, well, they're mopping up in there and then actually Trejo comes in and Bucho arrives. He leaves with his, with his right-hand man, whatever. And Trejo shows up and kind of just looks at these guys and it's like playing with one of his knives. And then I think it's like they're basically like, "Get the fuck outta here." And he doesn't. But then like they look away and when he looks back, he's gone. It's just sort of like he's just continually showing up as this sort of specter that's just in town and looking around and whatever. So now we cut to Bucho's compound, his home, and this armored limo shows up. And his right-hand man's so proud of it. He's like, "Bucho, look what I got. It's all set, exactly what you wanted. It's exactly what you wanted." And he's like super excited. Um, and he's like, okay, go, fine, take it and go find the guy that, that, that is doing that, killed all these men. Like, go find him. Like, you know, any— and he says, in town, you see anybody you don't recognize, just kill them.

Nic

Kill them.

Steve

Just don't— you know everybody in this town, go kill it. And which, by the way, all those white tourists are in deep shit now. There's officially green light on those guys.

Nic

It is funny that it's almost like unspoken that like, well, we're not fucking with the Americans because maybe that blows back too hard on us.

Steve

And they're like, good, that's bringing money into the crowd. He— if he's then, you know sort of the, uh, you know, if he's like in, uh, Roadhouse where he's, you know, Brad Wesley, you know, ringing the town full of the, you know, to get their money for protection. Well, they got to be having some outside money come into the town, and that's what your white tourists are for.

Nic

Like, yeah, these are your double-deuce, uh, patrons.

Steve

Maybe it should have been, if you see anybody Mexican you don't know, yeah, kill them. Maybe that would be more specific. You know, that's what he really wants.

Nic

Um, um, so, uh, let's see, they've got Uh, a couple things real quick. They were looking, um, El Mariachi and Carolina are kind of— she looks at his guitar case, right? And oh yeah, they open it up and they're looking at all the different things. And one thing, yeah, so this great like codpiece gun with like, you know, total dick and balls thing, looks great. Um, yep.

Steve

And, uh, saved him a couple of times or something like that. Yeah, yeah.

Nic

So Bucho gets a call and finds out that his boss— so he's not the boss boss, right? Yeah, yeah, he's still got people above.

Steve

They keep referencing that the Colombians are watching them closely, and so there's obviously this like, you know, they're probably in charge of the drugs. Yeah, there's some— there, it's— they're a certain level that is like higher than the street but not, not the supplier. They still— yeah, yeah.

Nic

Um, and he gets a call basically saying, we sent someone down here.

Steve

Yeah, yeah.

Nic

He's like, all right, what does this guy look like? Yeah, like, we're not gonna tell. He's like, I need to know what this motherfucker looks like so that we don't kill him because I just sent my guys out to kill everyone.

Steve

Yeah, right. Yeah.

Nic

And he's yelling at everyone. He's like, What's the phone number in my, in my limo?

Steve

That's right.

Nic

And no one knows. He's like, I don't know, it's a new car, boss.

Steve

The one guy that like shrugs and kind of smirks, he does it over and over again. He was like there for the limo delivery. Yes. With a big mustache. He's hilarious. Like every time he goes, like, he reminds me of like the plethora guy from, uh, the plethora guy from, from Three Amigos and also the like right-hand man, not Mexican, but the right-hand man of, uh, Governor Jay LePétomane in Blazing Saddles. The Slim Pickens character from Blazing Saddles also just kind of like, I don't know, like, you know, kind of thing.

Nic

Yeah, he's good. A little bit of comic relief because Buccio is not giving us much in terms of comedy. He's very serious. He's just the most serious man. He's very serious.

Steve

But before, like, at one point, so after leaving Carolina's, he asked, hey, can I leave my stuff here with you for a minute? Mariachi does. I gotta go to church. I gotta go confess. Gotta go to confession. So he goes in and it's not a priest in the booth with him, it's Buscemi, right? And he's basically telling him like, look, dude, you you know, I've looked around some more, like, you know, Bucho's not the top. If you, if you're going to keep going, you're never going to figure this out. This is never going to end. You don't want this. You should just fucking forget it. You got the guys that actually killed her. Stop it. Yeah, kind of thing. And he's like, no, I told you, Bucho is it, you know, kind of thing. But it's like his attempt to go, and he basically says, I'm not, I'm not sticking around with you. Like, I'm done, you know. Um, so when he goes to leave, he's then— they're then being followed by Danny Trejo, right? And so, and this is when we really get to see Trejo sort of armament. Yes, because he opens up his vest, whatever, he's got this, this almost cummerbund. Yeah, it is like of like of just so many throwing knives, like dozens and dozens of throwing knives. And so he starts kind of attacking Buscemi and Mariachi and kills Buscemi right away, a couple of throwing knives right after Buscemi says like, oh yeah, I plan on living a long— that's right, yeah, exactly. And, uh, so, so we've got— this is interesting too, I found like the kind of care— the actors who I most recognized in smaller bits all die fairly quickly after being introduced. The Cheech Marin, Quentin Tarantino, and now Buscemi lasted a little while, but still we're not, I don't think, halfway through the movie at this point, maybe about that, and he's dead. So it's like all these sort of like actors you'd recognize outside of Banderas and Hayek, they're, they're dying pretty quick, you know.

Nic

So yeah, um, so, uh, let's see, they are—.

Steve

Well, this is— so these—.

Nic

So the limo— so Trejo, and, uh, he's coming at them.

Steve

Yeah, he's coming up.

Nic

He's been killed. Yep. Mariachi's been hit by a couple of knives.

Steve

He's like 3 or 4. That's one of the spurts. He gets hit in the back and literally blood Oh, shoots over his shoulder.

Nic

There's some good squibs in this. This is a squib-heavy film. Uh, so the bulletproof limo pulls up though, and they, and they just see the melee, and it's like, all right, well, these have got to be the guys that we need to kill, right? Because we don't know these motherfuckers.

Steve

I don't know that they see who Trejo's attacking because now Mariachi's down the alleyway or whatever.

Nic

Yeah, but they just see him.

Steve

He's a guy we don't recognize, and he's got weapons, and he's like being aggressive. Yeah, kill him. And so he gets a bunch of them though with those knives.

Nic

Oh my God, really? His moves, I mean A bulletproof limo is no match for throwing knives. Like, when the bulletproof, uh, sunroof flips open and he just like starts chucking knives down in there like he's throwing a grenade into a tank.

Steve

Like, oh my God, dude, he's so video game.

Nic

Like, really good. Yeah, so he takes out a bunch of guys, um, but that he ends up getting shot and killed by that kid, the kid who broke his, uh, the broken leg.

Steve

He's now got a cast kind of on.

Nic

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, um, so he's kind of like one of the top henchmen or what.

Steve

Now that all the rest of them are dying. Yeah.

Nic

Yeah. So, so he takes out Trejo, which is a big mistake, but they don't know that yet. Yeah. So let's see, we got a kid.

Steve

Yes.

Nic

In town.

Steve

That's right.

Nic

This is kind of the other thing that we have to care about is there's this kid in town who's playing guitar and he wants El Mariachi to teach me how to play guitar and all this stuff.

Steve

And he says his name is Benito, which, which is important for later. Okay. Kid's name is Benito apparently.

Nic

So yeah. And Benito says you know, like, oh, I want to learn how to play guitar. My dad, uh, doesn't work.

Steve

He's kind of talking about his family a little bit, but he like was a mariachi. He said, yeah, it was a mariachi, but he doesn't like play anymore.

Nic

Uh, there's a scene where the kid is— he's trying to take, uh, El Mariachi. He's like, here, come here, I want to show you something.

Steve

Yeah, yeah.

Nic

And there's a scene where he's walking, uh, past this wall, and El Mariachi is walking past the wall, but he's bloodied, and he's kind of leaning against the wall and leaving streaks of blood on the wall. And I feel like that's one that Robert Rodriguez was very proud of.

Steve

It's a cool scene, but it's probably one of those things in his head where he's I think it'd be cool as fuck. But yeah, the kid like almost gets hit by a truck and Mariachi saves him. And then he's like, hey, I gotta go switch out my guitar or like trade my guitar or something, right? So this car drives up and the kid goes and brings the guitar to these like real shady looking dudes and they hand him a different guitar, whatever. And as they pull around the corner, they see Mariachi there. And again, you said he's all bloody or whatever, but he does have a gun on him. The dude tries to pull a gun and he's like, like, you know, no kind of thing, you know what I mean? It's like, dude, you know, you can drive away, but like, you're not— you know, don't do that kind of thing. So he does, but he takes the guitar back, breaks it open, and sure enough, there's a big old bag of cocaine inside or whatever. And this is— the kid then drops a dime on Carolina because he says like, what is this? Like, what do you do this? He said, well, because my dad like doesn't work, he just sits around. So he's like, I do this. Everybody in town does this, right?

Nic

Even Carolina, because he mentioned the bookstore. He was talking about the, the locations and stuff.

Steve

Exactly.

Nic

Businesses.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And Uh, yeah, so Carolina has a bookstore cafe place.

Steve

Yep.

Nic

Worst set in the entire movie. They put no effort into it. It is like one wall of books that don't even look like books that would be for sale at a bookstore.

Steve

It looks like a library reference light.

Nic

Like, I have that in my office around the corner.

Steve

And then a single, like, espresso machine off on the side of the counter. It's not really a cafe, it's just like, I've got an espresso machine. It just—.

Nic

And whatever. But it feels no different in there than in the dusty bar.

Steve

Like, which I think is like, here's, here's the reality of the situation though, because she tells us a little bit of the backstory. Her parents owned the building, so she has an apartment upstairs. Her parents are dead and they left her the building, and she created the bookstore in the building. She did not inherit a bookstore.

Nic

Gotcha.

Steve

So she wanted to make a bookstore in this town, which, you know, everybody told her was stupid because nobody reads, like, whatever. Yeah, but she like put all that kind of together herself.

Nic

So it is a little, you know, so it makes more sense that it doesn't look like a fresh-off-the-assembly-line Borders.

Steve

It was probably like a restaurant or something, whatever, when her parents owned it. But like, yeah, it's— she turned it into Libros y Café.

Nic

Okay, okay, that makes sense. And, and she said, um, you know, El Mariachi's confronting her, but like, you're taking money from Bucho, like, what is wrong with you? And she says— he's like, you're, you're doing good, your business is doing good. And she's like, no, my business isn't doing good. Bucho pays me $50,000 a year. I'm glad they're working in USD here.

Steve

It's a smart move, makes it easier. The translation would have been especially hard. The Mexican peso got like recalibrated, I think, at some point in the '90s. Yeah, yeah, it was right around that time because it was like, oh, used to be like 5,000 pesos a dollar, and then suddenly it was like 300 or something. It was just a very different thing.

Nic

But yeah, the new peso.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

Um, so, uh, so Bucho comes into the bookstore and she's still kind of dealing with, you know, El Mariachi's up on the counter, right?

Steve

Right. Because, well, because he's—.

Nic

She sewed up his face because now he got new wounds that he has to have fixed. So she's stitching him up and he's sitting up on the counter, but then Bucho and his guys are right outside.

Steve

Yes.

Nic

So she shoves him off the counter onto the floor, and then to mask that shoves her cash register onto the other side of the door to make the noise.

Steve

Exactly, smart, very smart move.

Nic

Yeah, really smart move. And then Buccio for some reason comes in by himself.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

The henchmen stay outside, but I think it's 'cause he wants a little action from her too.

Steve

I think it's one of those things where everybody knows her, right? So the henchmen don't view her as any kind of threat 'cause they know her. And it's clear from the way Buccio acts, if they haven't had relations before, 'cause he kind of hints that they do later too, They've either been together or he, you know, has gotten closer. I don't know. There's something there where, like, he's acting like they're very familiar. Yeah. And, you know, he kisses her and she doesn't really push away. She doesn't love it. She kind of turns away a little bit, but like, she's not forcing him away. She's kind of like, this guy's going to do the fuck he wants to do, you know?

Nic

And that's probably the deal in the town is he's just like, he takes whatever. Everything's his.

Steve

Exactly. But so they're chatting for a bit. And I love that this was one of my favorite sort of moments that wasn't a bombastic action scene in the movie is, is El Mariachi's sitting behind the bar, can't be seen, but has to be super quiet, right? So as they're talking, while she's talking, he kind of ejects the clip from his gun, looks and sees he has no bullets in it, you know, finds the other clip, like he's in his pocket maybe or whatever, and then has to like very slowly kind of click it back into place. And she recognizes what's going on. You can tell there's a recognition on her face that Bucho doesn't have, where she stops talking, 'cause she's done talking, she's whatever she's doing, but then she kinda goes, and she starts talking again, which gives him audio clearance essentially to click the little clip into place, and then he has to like pull the hammer back and all this stuff, and it's a really just really great tense moment of him trying to be prepared without drawing attention to himself, and a gun at the side, I mean, this is like a.50 caliber pistol he's holding, or not.50 caliber, whatever, the.50, like a Desert Eagle kind of weapon. It's loud, right? These are heavy metal components that are loud when they click together, but she keeps, talking more to like cover, give him audio cover. I thought it was really, really great little moment between the two of them when they couldn't have really communicated together. She picked up on shit so fast. Yeah. You know, and it was really great. So he's able to like get his gun ready and of course doesn't need it. Butcher leaves. But, but it was really kind of neat, tense little moment where it's like, oh, is he going to get heard? Is Butcher just going to get up? Is he going to look over at any point? Like, at no point did he even look over because he sort of concentrated on Carolina, which, you know, and it was tense because like the movie to this point has been like all shootouts.

Intro Clip

Yeah.

Nic

You know, so why wouldn't there be another shootout here?

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

Um, yeah, really good. Uh, and, and she, you know, she's smooth there. Bucho and the crew leave. Um, we get a sex scene between, uh, El Mariachi and Carolina. There's entirely too many candles for like how much they're probably moving the walls. And like, I don't know how structurally sound those shelves are and stuff. It feels like it's a, you know, it's a problem waiting to happen.

Steve

But, but it's a good scene in that— I mean, obviously it's a good scene for lots of reasons. I mean, Salma Hayek's beautiful, they're both very sexy people, so it's like, it's great that way. But it also like, it feels tender, it feels warm, between the lighting, the music they choose, like all this stuff. And so it feels a little bit very much, uh, like they're connected. This is not— this is not 8 Mile, right? Reference in the past, right?

Nic

Um, and then we get the immediate cut, right?

Steve

We juxtapose that with Bucho and his girl, and it's— or is it even— is it even his girl that's in the— I couldn't quite tell.

Nic

I couldn't tell if it was like that kind of henchman.

Steve

Yeah, exactly. What, some random kind of hooker or something? I don't know. But whoever he's with, he does not give a shit.

Nic

He is fully distant.

Steve

He's smoking a cigar, blows it in her face, and she like Chokes and coughs. It's like, holy shit, this couldn't be more different.

Nic

He was just like catatonically looking forward. It's like a guy who has $10,000 bet on a football game and it's in the third quarter and, you know, he's lost like ages ago and it's just kind of like, what the fuck, dude?

Steve

His team is down by 40.

Nic

And Buccio like blows cigar smoke in his face and everything. He's gross. But then he kind of has this realization and he's like, Mariachi's in the fucking bookstore.

Steve

He calls his right-hand guy and he's like, he's there. Like, and this was, I thought, weird. And I know why it had to happen for the movie, but for the character it felt weird. He says, if she's hiding, if she's hiding in there, kill them both, make it look like an accident. Why the fuck would he care if it looks like an accident?

Nic

I don't think that matters.

Steve

But then he says, an accident, it's a bookstore, light it on fire, which it's like, is gonna make for a really cool scene and also sort of like thrusts the other characters into situation where they have no, no other choices. So I get it from like a plot perspective, but in the moment, I don't see why it would make any sense for Buccio to give a shit that it looks like an accident.

Nic

That's a really good point because he— the only authority to him is whoever's calling him on the phone, right? I mean, the cops— like, there's not a cop in this whole movie. Like, you don't see any of that stuff. Um, so yeah, that's a good point. Uh, but they get there and they're outside the window. So, uh, Carolina is singing.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And she has her eyes closed and everything's a very tender scene as El Mariachi is sitting down there, laying down, and sees the shadows of these guys outside the window.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And he slowly pulls his guns out. So he's got a gun on each guy but doesn't disturb her singing, you know? And as they're kind of walking behind her, they're both there. So it's like, well, I can't shoot through her. So he just boots her over and starts— yeah, starts shooting at these guys.

Steve

Also, are we to believe— it seems like in the way the day is going, that this scene with her and the guitar and the guys approaching the apartment happened kind of right after the sex that they had. Yeah, he is fully dressed, he's got his boots on, and he's laying in bed. I just don't— and again, we have to because we have to about to have him go, you know, he's not gonna get dressed. Yeah, he's not gonna have time to get dressed if he has to, you know what I'm saying? So I get it again from a plot perspective, but it's like, character—.

Nic

Was he fucking with the boots on then?

Steve

Well, we saw them, they were both completely butt naked. We saw them in the thing, there was, you know, lots of skin in that scene. So another thing where it's like, there I— I'll be totally honest, this is where the movie starts to have— I start having problems with it.

Nic

One, I 100% agree because I loved it to this point. Yep.

Steve

And it was— and it was the very first crack for me was Bucho saying, make it look like an accident. I was like, why the fuck does he care? And numerous things we're about to get to, I went, what, what, what? And it really kind of— this movie to me a little bit falls apart from this part out, but we'll keep going.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

But basically, like, it's another great shootout scene. And then she's— I do love that, you know, she's trying to get her shoes on. First of all, girl, heels? You don't got any flats you can throw on? You really think— am I supposed to believe that a woman who lives in a little village in Mexico doesn't own a pair of fucking, like, sandals?

Nic

Dirt roads and stuff. It's not like— yeah, you're not walking around a mall.

Steve

Yeah, exactly. But she throws on mismatched pumps, which is pretty cool. They're fighting. They go down the stairs into the— and to go out through the front door of the bookstore. And of course it's on fire. So this is one of the reasons we had to have— but of course Bucho didn't need to say, "Accident." He could have just said, "Kill them both and light that fucking bookstore on fire." He could have just been aggro about it and it would have made more sense. Anyway, that happens, so they have to go back up, and now they're basically up on the roof, which is like scary because it doesn't seem like— it seems like there's a lot of distance between these buildings. Yeah. Um, but she runs and jumps like a fucking track star, taking the heels off, of course, right? You know, but then him, uh, what— talk to me about how does this work? It looks like he falls.

Nic

So El Mariachi— so, uh, Carolina jumps to the other building because there's guys who are coming up her— yes, after them, right? They got to do something She jumps to the other building. He throws the guitar case over there and it lands. And then he's somehow like tipping off the building on his tiptoes and it looks like he's about to fall off. But then he gets enough thrust out of his legs that he can do like the backwards jump, right? He's shooting at the guys on the old building with his 2 guns.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And has enough power to like land comfortably on the other building. He can barely make it with 10 feet to spare. Like, he's like the middle of the building, dude. If we're talking about the hockey game in Clerks, he landed on center ice, right?

Steve

Exactly.

Nic

And, uh, oh my God. Yeah, so I don't, I don't, I don't get the physics of that at all.

Steve

Yeah, but it looked cool.

Nic

And again, that's one of those things where it's like, oh, it would be cool if someone did this, you know?

Steve

And then we get the, the most, uh, uh, uh, I would call sort of formatted or pre-planned shot of the entire movie. He takes a couple of grenades out of the guitar case. There's 2 guys down on the street. He throws the grenades down. As they start running away, the grenades explode And, and as they're walking, uh, Carolina and Mariachi are walking along the rooftop, this big explosion happens behind them, right? And it's a great— I mean, honestly, it's probably the COVID for this episode. Yeah, because it's a great shot, the flame behind them, and they're walking holding hands and she's got his jacket on. Fucking classic.

Nic

Really cool visual.

Steve

Really fucking cool. Like you were saying, you know, comparing like Tarantino and Rodriguez, and Rodriguez having such this visual language in this visual style. This was like, again, one of the coolest images in a movie full of cool images.

Nic

Yeah, for sure.

Steve

Very, very neat.

Nic

Um, and, uh, while they were on the roof, uh, he had a clean shot at Butcher, right?

Steve

But you're right.

Nic

Yeah, right, because she says, that's Butcher.

Steve

There he is. There, that's him.

Nic

Yeah, and he— and he can't—.

Steve

He sees his face.

Nic

Yep.

Steve

And he— then he— and then he doesn't. And he doesn't tell Carolina why. He doesn't tell us why. Like, the audience is left in the dark like she is. Yeah, it's fine, that's a choice, but it doesn't make a lot of sense to this point. Um, it was very strange, and it was strange that he didn't immediately tell her. It was very, that to me was a very odd choice.

Nic

Yeah, that would've seemed pretty relevant.

Steve

'Cause she's pissed. She's like, what the fuck? Like, he just blew up my business. He knows I'm with you, so he's gonna kill me if he gets a chance. What the fuck, dude? Could you please kill this asshole?

Nic

Yeah, and it's even like, if not for your murdered lover and your fucking guitar hand, how about the shit that just happened and is happening?

Steve

Like, I will bang you more.

Nic

That will justify killing this guy, right?

Steve

Right. Get rid of him and we are cool. We can bang as often as you like. Just get rid of that fucking guy.

Nic

Um, so Bujo is fucking pissed, right?

Steve

Yes.

Nic

He's back at his, uh, compound, right? And he's like, you know, you see someone you don't know, you shoot them. How, how fucking hard is that?

Steve

So fucking simple.

Nic

What you do— and this is all this group of his guys all standing in front of him— and then he just looks in the middle to the guy that we like. He's like, hey, I don't know that man.

Steve

Who's that?

Nic

And everyone starts backing away from me. He's like, oh, Bucho, you know, and he shoots and kills him. So, you know, he's furious. I love that he has the bulletproof limo, and as the guys are driving away, he's just taking potshots at the limo because what the hell, it's bulletproof, there's no harm in that.

Steve

Even funnier, we can't skip past this part though. He kills the one dude and then gives the gun back to his right-hand man. He says, see, see how simple that is?

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

And all of his guys are still kind of milling about, they're kind of looking at the corpse, and he goes and he looks and he takes the gun back from him, goes, right Hey, who are these guys? Yes, I don't know these guys either. I've never seen them either. And they all like dive behind the hay bales. So funny. So good. Oh my God. Um, so yeah, so now Buccia— or not Buccia, uh, Carolina and Mariachi are chatting. Mariachi's still not explaining why he has not killed Buccio, why he chose not to kill Buccio. But he says, you need to go take all the money that you have. You said you saved a bunch of money. She's like, yeah, it was in the fucking books.

Nic

Which, like, banana stand type situation.

Steve

Yeah, but if you're gonna sell the books Why is the money in the books? It's one thing if it's in the bookstore, but she said they were hidden in the books. I guess she was so convinced no one was ever gonna come in to buy books from her bookstore that she just stashed it there.

Nic

It's all just hollowed out.

Steve

It's right there. All the pages are cut out, you know, kind of thing. My wife actually made me one of those out of a copy of, oh God, it was Confederacy of Dunces.

Nic

Nice.

Steve

Yeah, so I got one of those, which if you ever come over to my house, don't grab my copy of Confederacy of Dunces.

Nic

You get a rock hammer in there for making your own chess pieces.

Steve

Exactly. Pieces. But no, so he's like trying to explain to her like, well, you just need to go. And she's like, I got nothing. Like, that was it. Like, I'm fucked. Like, if you don't do this, don't you— you said you had friends. Can't you call friends? And he's like, campo and campa and kino, they would tear the town apart. She's like, yeah, okay, I'm fine with that. Yeah, I'm cool with that. Let's, let's do that. So sure enough, he gets on the phone, he calls, he calls campa and kino.

Nic

Yes. And this is again very cool. And plot-wise, whatever, I don't care. This looks cool as shit. And, and it introduces us to some new styles of what weaponry, which is all we're looking for, right? So yeah, we got the 3 mariachis here. We got his 2 buddies, Campo and Kina.

Steve

Campa and Kino.

Nic

Campa and Kino. And then El Mariachi like walks up next to them. So we got the 3 dudes and again, they're being shot at immediately. Oh yeah. The limo comes up.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

They're getting blasted at. But if you don't care about the bullets, act like you don't need the shit and they give you the shit for free. Act like you're not going to get shot and you will not get shot. There you go.

Steve

I don't know which one is Camp and which was Kino. I didn't, I didn't double go back and double check, but like whichever one's got the bazooka guitar case, when he gets down into that stance with the leg out like he's a catcher about to throw down to second base, I love it every time. He does it every time he shoots that thing. He's gonna get braced, you know, this sounds so good.

Nic

Okay, so we had one guy has 2 guitar cases which just have machine guns that shoot directly out of the guitar case. So he's holding it by the guitar case handle and every time he'll like kind of flip it up, the sounds of it cocking and reloading, very satisfying. The rocket launcher guy, really, really good guy.

Steve

Really great stuff. Because he also sort of just, you know, hoists it up and pulls it down and you hear kachunk, like a loud sound of like, I guess another bazooka rocket getting placed into place. Like that doesn't work like that for sure, but still. And he fires like 4 or 5. So many bazooka rockets, like oh my God.

Nic

And the machine gun guy, again, he's just kind of waving them around.

Steve

Oh, very haphazard.

Nic

Those handles are not super fixed to the case. So it's not gonna like directly correlate to how the case itself is turning.

Steve

Give there.

Nic

Yeah, it's bad. And plus, how heavy is that fucking thing? But I don't care, it's awesome. It was very cool to see these guys, and we just get these guys for a very short period of time.

Steve

Yep.

Nic

The rocket launcher guy ends up getting hit and shooting his rocket straight up in the air, right? And then it just comes down, lands on his face, and while the other guy is walking away and just kind of gives like a, a very subtle wince of like, oh damn, my best friend got killed, oh well. And then he gets taken out Immediately, you know, uh, and the kid got shot.

Steve

Yes, the kid caught astray. Little Benito caught astray. And but now, but Carolina now has stolen one of the trucks that Bucho's men showed up in, and like they're throwing the kid into it and they're driving off, uh, uh, you know, whatever, to get him to a hospital. Yeah, so they do take him to a hospital, and you know, these people start working on the kid or whatever, and Mariachi leaves because he and Carolina have some unfinished business to attend to. To. So they go up to Bucho's compound. She knows where it is, so he says, you know— or no, she actually is like, I don't think this is it, are you sure this is it? This is definitely it. Um, again, we don't— we still don't understand the connection. Yeah, we don't know Mariachi and Bucho, but they go inside, uh, seemingly unarmed, you know, whatever. And there is Bucho and like what, 10 henchmen? Yeah, along with his like girl henchman, whatever, he's like lieutenant now. And because the other right-hand man was killed by— in, in the, the shootout with—.

Nic

They ran him over with—.

Steve

They ran over the car, which is pretty go, uh, with the Jeep. So, but now, but he was— and, and they recognize each other. Bucho and Mariachi recognize each other, and Bucho says, Benito. So his name is also Benito, which I think is an interesting choice to have the kid now. His name Benito. Benito and Cesar, I think. So they start talking to each other like, yeah, they're brothers. Bucho is Mariachi's older brother Cesar. Um, there's a bunch of sort of like family squabble and like, Dad this, and like, whatever, you killed a bunch of my men and Dad wouldn't be proud of you anymore, and da da, all this kind of stuff. And he basically, Bucho basically is to make this even, I'll call, I'll wipe the slate clean between us if I just, you just let me kill Carolina. Yeah. Kill her, I'll kill her in front of you and then we'll be even. And then so what happens next is definitely one of the things I have an issue with.

Nic

Yes.

Steve

In the movie. Yeah. He does another one of his really cool, the guns come outta my sleeves kind of moment. He's got the 2 and he points and bang, bang, bang. And then we cut to bedside at the hospital and little Benito and Mariachi is there and Benito wakes up and Benito's Dad shows up and it's a sweet moment. Yeah, how the fuck did they get out of there? How did they get out of Bucho's compound?

Nic

For as much as we've seen in this film, you can't yada yada the final— yeah, you know, you have to like— because yeah, that situation— or are we to believe that the henchmen were just like, oh well, Bucho's dead, I don't work for anyone anymore, so go ahead and pass?

Steve

I can't—.

Nic

It seems like he would have had to take everyone out. I would have liked at least one shot of them leaving the place. It's fine, you don't have to show the whole shootout. We've had a lot of shooting, budget limitations, whatever. Walk out of that with a bunch of like dead bodies and maybe like one guy mopping, you know? Like, I want to see— I want to see some carnage in the aftermath. Because yeah, that's a good point, because we don't know like what happened there.

Steve

And I can't imagine that, that whoever's left doesn't kill him. And here's the reason: with Bucho dead, one of them gets to run—.

Nic

Comes the guy.

Steve

Yeah, but you still don't want this guy hanging out. He's been killing all these people, like whatever. So it's very strange. It never gets any kind of explanation. I think it was just honestly it feels very much like a thing where Robert Rodriguez was like, I don't fucking know how they would get out of there, but I need them to, so we're just gonna cut to the hospital. So yeah, so that thing is, you know, how did they survive? But anyway, that's now, Mariachi leaves, walking down the dirt road, you know, the sort of deserted highway. He's got the guitar case and Carolina drives up behind him and is basically like, hey, I got nowhere to be now since my bookstore got blowed up, and will you wanna hang out?

Nic

And he's like, hey, we got a free car.

Steve

Yeah, we got the car. So he throws the guitar case, like, yeah, like I'm done. Son. Yeah, gets in the car with her. I think they kiss, like, whatever, and she drives off, and then they back back up to go get the guitar case. He goes, just in case.

Nic

Yeah, one of the, um, one of the things they repeat between, uh, Carolina and El Mariachi is he'll say, uh, did I ever thank you?

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And she'll be like, no. He'll be like, I will.

Steve

Yeah, you know, that's right.

Nic

So, uh, yeah, they come back for the guitar case and drive off into the sunset.

Steve

And, um, just that part's fine. I'm fine with that part. Yeah, that's okay.

Nic

They really speed up the this though. Yeah, so, uh, yeah, that is Desperado. And then we just go straight to the end. So it's like an hour 45, I think, you know, decent length for the movie.

Steve

But we could have had a 5-minute scene of that final battle easily if there was— if there was a real way to get them out of that compound, we could have seen it. There was definitely time to spare, you know, like this movie does not suffer from an extra 5 minutes of gunplay, right? It would have been— would have been welcome. All right, that is Desperado. Nick, you brought this to the table, so let's get your rating first.

Nic

Oh man, uh, you know, despite the issues— because I'm— I agree with you that towards the end, I mean, kind of like starting with the, the sex scene, which I'm not complaining about, um, but it did kind of like— it felt, I don't know, rushed, or just it wasn't as well put together. And as like just a visual experience of sitting back and letting something cool wash over you, this movie's very enjoyable. Enjoyable to watch. It goes fast. There's not a lot that drags. I mean, there's not a ton I would, I would cut out. There's maybe some stuff I would add, right? I don't think there's any acting that's noticeably bad. Like, everyone is— everyone's pretty solid in it. Things, things generally look good.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

Um, I would recommend watching this, I think, especially to see kind of the evolution of like, how do we get to John Wick? Yeah, this is kind of like one of the steps that gets us to this action star that we have. And like, a lot of these creative sequences that are happening during the gunfights are inspired by this kind of stuff. And I'm sure Rodriguez is inspired by all these other people, but it's nice to see like an evolutionary John Wick a little bit. Yeah, this was a lot of fun, and I, I think it's— I think it's worth a watch. I'm gonna give Desperado a 3.5 out of 5.

Steve

All right, very nice. I would say, just to double up on the John Wick thing you mentioned, I feel like even if you're just looking at American films, which the John Wick stuff is obviously clearly inspired by Hong Kong Hong Kong cinema as well. But if you were just looking at American movies and you watched Desperado, uh, The Replacement Killers with Chow Yun Fat, and, uh, Kill Bill, and you watch those three movies and then John Wick, you would feel a very natural progression of style, I think, through those first three movies and like the way they're choreographed and the way that they're stylized, uh, and whatever. And I think it's— and frankly, I am a huge fan of the John Wick films, so yeah, very much, they're wonderful. Um, not as big a fan of this film if I'm just being totally honest. Uh, it was enjoyable. It's an action movie. I can absolutely turn my brain off for action movies. The problems that I had with it really were, even in an action movie, um, like for instance in Commando, where the character should absolutely be getting shot more often than he is and kind of whatever, I felt like everything was a little more consistent though. The character still acted like the characters that were, that were set up, you know, like John Matrix does things that you'd expect him to do based on previous stuff. When Bucho said, make it look like an accident, that ripped me out of the movie right away. It really was I was like, excuse me, I beg your finest fucking pardon, why does he give a shit about looking like an actor? Doesn't make any sense.

Nic

And then it's so funny, the things that can pull us out of movies, you know, that really stick with us.

Steve

There was that, and then it was like, you know, the fact that he was dressed completely immediately after the sex scene was interesting. I mean, not as bad, but you know, all these little things that added up until you get to the end, which by the way, the whole brother thing I thought was like, ugh, really?

Nic

That, that did seem too much like— and I wonder when this stuff happens, is is it just an unoriginal generic thing, or is it an homage to all the classic movies always had the guy end up as his brother? Because you could read it both ways, sure, but it doesn't make me like it anymore, really. I don't care that much.

Steve

And if that's the, the call or whatever, like, I am not personally familiar enough with the movies that it's sort of like referencing or whatever to really understand that. And that's on me, that's not on Robert Rodriguez. Uh, in general, I, I'm kind of on the fence as to whether I'd recommend this. If you're a big fan of action movies and you haven't seen Desperado, yeah, See it, it's a good action movie. You know, like I said, Salma Hayek and Antonio Banderas are both incredibly sexy in this, and a lot of great gunplay, a lot of good gunfights, you know, good humor from Cheech Marin and Quentin Tarantino and Steve Buscemi. There's great funny little moments too, but I'm a 2.5 out of 5, okay, uh, on Desperado. It definitely kind of comes just under that bar of like clearly a recommendation for me. Uh, you said 3.5, right? Yeah, so 6 out of 10, uh, from the 2 Dads on Desperado. And let's see, that brings us up to 1996.

Nic

Oh, you got '96?

Steve

I got '96, and I I believe that that means we're going to go to L.A.

Nic

Okay.

Steve

We're going to go to L.A. And I've got such— it's going to be fun when we talk about it next week's episode because I have such a connection to this movie that I'll get into then. But basically, we're going to go to Los Angeles. We're going to meet with some sort of— what's the word— aspiring actors trying to make their way through the L.A. dating scene of the mid-'90s. This movie really launched several careers. Not, not that they were the first movie movie for these people, but like really kind of put them on the map as like, maybe these guys are not side characters, right? Or could be stars. So Jon Favreau and Vince Vaughn both really hit the scene in this movie. And we're gonna watch 1996's Swingers, uh, which was a lot of fun. I, I have not seen it in several, several years, probably 10 or 15 years since I've watched it. But this— there was a time this was one of those movies I would watch like on a monthly basis. Yeah, a while, uh, in high school and in college.

Nic

Um, another depiction of like what thought cool.

Steve

Oh yeah, absolutely. Yes, 100%. And this, you know, they got the zoot suits and the wallet chains and they're doing the beautiful baby this and that, and there's a whole bunch of misogyny that's not gonna hold up. But I was thinking about it actually this morning before we came in to do this. I think it's okay because even then those characters being that way were not meant to be liked. They were being shown to us as like, these guys are doofuses. Yeah, yeah, these guys are dipshits. Like the whole movie ends with, you know, well, we'll get into it, but like, but it'll be interesting to like kind of look at it with the lens of today and look back at swingers. So that's what we'll watch next week.

Nic

Awesome. I can't wait.

Steve

Very much fun. All right. That's a wrap. If you like what you heard, please consider heading over to Apple or Spotify and leaving us a 5-star review. It helps new folks find the show. Be sure to check out our website at 2dads1movie.com. That's the number 2 and the number 1. There you can explore the movies we've covered, sign up for our newsletter, The Rewind, and even get sneak previews of upcoming episodes. Once again, this has been Desperado, another episode 2 Dads 1 Movie. I'm Steve.

Nic

And I'm Nic.

Steve

Thank you so much for listening, and we'll catch you next week.

Nic

Thanks, everyone.