Transcript

Intro Clip

It says he represents the Tanaka clan. You don't look like Tanaka. Shidoshi Tanaka trained me. What's the whole act? He says Senzo Tanaka is his shidoshi. What's the difference if Bruce Springsteen is his shidoshi? If Senzo Tanaka is his shidoshi, then show us the dim mak. What the hell is a dim mak? Death touch. Thanks. Vic, choose a brick. Okay, Frank. Uh, what about this one? Go! 4-2-1. Whoa, yeah! Son of a bitch! Is that good enough, guys? We honor your invitation. No shit, you honor his invitation.

Steve

It's Two Dads One Movie. It's the podcast where two middle-aged dads sit around and shoot the shit. About the movies of the '80s and '90s. Here are your hosts, Steve Paulo and Nic Briana. Hello everybody, welcome to another episode of 2 Dads 1 Movie. I'm Steve.

Nic

And I'm Nic.

Steve

And today we are talking about the 1988 Jean-Claude Van Damme action classic Bloodsport. And Nic, you brought us Bloodsport. You brought it to the table. What's your history with the movie?

Nic

Oh man, I, I caught this one, uh, around high school, my young teens, and I think this got passed around because The idea of it was very fun. So this is at the time where we're getting into like Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter 2 and stuff.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And there weren't really at that time a ton of movies that were about these multidisciplinary fighting competitions.

Steve

Right. You know, good point.

Nic

So this one, it really would stimulate your imagination just thinking about like the sumo guy going against the guy who just hops around like a chimp and like all these different moves that, uh, that these guys bring to the table and the different looks and stuff. And I thought it was cool. Van Damme was never my favorite action star, but There was only so much Arnie and Stallone to go around, so you had to start dipping into the Van Dams and the Seagulls and the if you really got desperate, you're getting into the Michael Dudikoffs and the Jeff Speakmans and stuff like that. But I thought this would be a fun one to chat about. I haven't watched it in a while, but it's one that most guys our age at least understand the reference of, right? The Kumite and the and then Van Damme famously like two of his big things are. Doing the splits. So how are we gonna fit the splits into the movie? And number 2 is kicking only with your right foot at all times. So how are we gonna make that happen? And I think they figured it out. So yeah, I'm excited to talk about this one. It had been a while, but I was glad to, uh, to have rewatched it. How about you, Steve? You've seen this one before?

Steve

I had never seen Bloodsport before this week. It just missed me somehow. I think, uh, you know, there was this— I think there were a lot of action movies. It's kind of like the Rambo films, movies that like I would incorporate elements of it just because my friends would talk about it. And so it ended up feeling like I knew the movie before I ever like watched it. And I think that this one was interesting in 2 ways because not like Bloodsport. So not only did this, this came out 3 years before Street Fighter II came out. And so it is impossible to look at Street Fighter II and not say, well, that is directly influenced by Bloodsport.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

You know, obviously it's not an adaptation of the movie, but like the whole concept of a secret underground international street fighting mixed martial arts competition with fighters of all these different styles. You know, the Guile character is a military— American military. It's clearly Jean-Claude Van Damme's, you know, person in this movie. That Frank Dux character is clearly who Guile, right, was.

Nic

And then Johnny Cage in Mortal Kombat had a move where he went down into the splits, like directly taken from this.

Steve

Absolutely. And that character— I think Johnny Cage is even more explicitly, this is Jean-Claude Van Damme in so many ways, right? But like so much of this movie, you know, became Street Fighter II. And so I played, and I played, you know, thousands of hours of that over the years. So there's that. And then—.

Nic

Who's your preferred character in Street Fighter II?

Steve

So if we're talking about the original Street Fighter II, I was—.

Nic

Let's, yeah.

Steve

I was mostly a Ken player.

Nic

Okay.

Steve

Um, and then when we got to the Turbo and Hyper Fighting Championship Edition, you could play as the bosses. I became a Vega, uh, guy.

Nic

So, yeah. Oh, 'cause Vega could climb that chain link fence and dive down.

Steve

But only on Vega's level. You could still do the wall bounce off the edge of the screen though, where you could kind of like, so yeah, there was that. And I, I just, I definitely got, I— there was one summer where I went to like a computer camp, basically, uh, on the campus of St. Mary's College, and we stayed in the dorm for a week, Greg Nielsen and I. And we— there was a, you know, student union with a Street Fighter II arcade machine, and there was a point where I stayed on one quarter. I think I beat like 8 or 9 people in a row.

Nic

Nice.

Steve

Which was definitely still the highlight of my entire life.

Nic

Um, see, I get too— I— it's interesting to hear that you're a Ken player because I would get too tied up in the guys that had like crazy special features that didn't pay off that well, right? So you get like a Blanka where you do that electrocution thing, or the Dhalsim where he could like reach super far. He had those stretchy arms. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So none of those guys in here, but for sure like the basic dudes, like the basic types, I think are very well represented, uh, in Street Fighter and Mortal Kombat from this, uh, from this movie.

Steve

Yeah, very clear, very clear reference there. And then most recently I realized I didn't know the full references of this movie because in the show The Bear— I don't know if you've ever watched it, but it's one of my favorite shows of recent years— one of earliest episodes, a bunch of the guys before they've like turned the restaurant into a fancy restaurant, they're talking about something and basically talk about like, you know, Saint-Matthieu, Saint-Matthieu. And I was kind of like, what the hell is that? Like, and they even in the show say something about it's Bloodsport or whatever, you know, they make a reference to it. And I go, oh, I don't know what that— like, I never heard that thing before. So now obviously I do know what that means having watched it. So, but yeah, so this is one of those movies that I feel like not having watched it, you still get some familiarity with it because of other references it is or other influence it has had on popular culture.

Nic

Yeah, for sure.

Steve

But by not actually having seen it, like, I didn't get that whole picture. So it's kind of filled in all those blanks for me, um, which is great. Let's jump into the facts.

Nic

Let's jump into the facts.

Steve

All right, so the movie Bloodsport was released on February 26th, 1988 with an R rating and a running time of 92 minutes. It was directed by Newt Arnold, written by Sheldon Lettich, Christopher Cosby, and Mel Friedman. The film stars Jean-Claude Van Damme, Donald Gibb, and Lea Ayers. Uh, scores. Rotten Tomatoes, Rotten Tomatoes 48%, so pretty much half and half. IMDb 6.8, not particularly good. This was another movie like last week's Summer Rental, and yeah, this one I don't have a good reason for, I don't know, but it did not get a review from Siskel and Ebert. So I don't know if this was one they just chose not to bother with or what.

Nic

I mean, we'll get to it in a minute, but this is a very low-budget movie, so it might not have had wide release at the time it first came out or something.

Steve

Entirely possible. Uh, one awards thing that I did want to call out here. So in 1989 at the Razzies, Jean-Claude Van Damme was nominated but did not win the Worst New Star Award. That was won that year by Ronald McDonald. The actual McDonald's clown mascot was given the award for, quote, playing himself in the movie Mac and Me.

Nic

Oh boy.

Steve

Which is weird, but that's the Razzies. So what do you do? But it's, it's, I looked at the list and the only name that was nominated that year that was a real person and someone who had a career later on is Jean-Claude Van Damme. None of the other people nominated for that made any sense. But anyway, no other awards buzz on this movie other than the Worst New Star Razzie. On a $1.5 million budget, which like—.

Nic

Wow.

Steve

Very impressive. I mean, look, most of this movie's fight choreography. So as long as you're able to pay a choreographer a fairly small amount to do reasonably good stuff, that's good. There's not a lot of special effects outside of some makeup. There's no— there are no injuries that require significant— this is not a John Carpenter movie.

Nic

Yes.

Steve

Right?

Nic

Right.

Steve

Nothing's being ripped off of anyone anything crazy like that.

Nic

That's all— it's all just implied.

Steve

And there's like 4 sets in the whole movie, basically. So it makes sense how you could get it down to $1.5 million. It made $63.5 million at the box office, 42 times what it cost. So massive successful hit, especially based off of, of the, uh, the budget. So yeah, this was a huge hit. There's no, no denying that.

Nic

Yeah, well, uh, let's kick it off, Nick. Kick it off in Bloodsport. So, um, this kicks off kind of with an opening montage of all these different fighters who represent different styles. And, uh, and it shows them kind of training and showing their skills. Actually a very cool, like, kind of perfect way to start this movie off. Um, and we've got your standard kind of like, uh, karate kung fu guys, and we've got your sumo guys, we've got your wrestlers. Some guys, their style just seems to be brute strength, like it doesn't necessarily matter. There's this really small guy who like hops around like a lemur or like this, and, and it shows him, he like shimmies up a tree super fast and he's smashing coconuts with his fists and stuff. And just such a— yeah, like if you're in the writer's room and you're trying to figure out like what's a crazy style. But I think a lot of this stuff is real, certain types of martial arts. Like capoeira and stuff like that is very odd looking if you're, if you're seeing it next to other styles, right?

Steve

Yeah, because we get a Brazilian guy, Paredes is his last name, and he's doing capoeira. And there's like, there's, you know, uh, Muay Thai and there's all this stuff. I gotta be honest with you though, that African character that runs up into the trees and chops the coconuts with his hand and later bounces around the ring like a monkey.

Nic

Kind of the most racist character.

Steve

The most racist thing I've seen in a long time. Yeah, it is really bad. Like, that would not fly today whatsoever. You can't do that. You could maybe get away with that style if it was any other race of actor. You just cannot do that with a Black man.

Nic

It was, it was a little, it was a little tough.

Steve

It would have been a little rough then. Watching it now for the first time is like, are you— you beg your finest fucking pardon? Like, really, we're doing that?

Nic

I do, I do need to find out though, is this based on a real style? Like, how true is that? So It could be a thing, but yeah, I mean, not knowing that, it is like, yo, it doesn't play well. What are we doing here? Um, so, uh, so we've got the different montage of, of that happening, and then, and then we have, uh, Van Damme, Captain Frank Dukes, and he's, he's in the army.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And, uh, they're kind of telling him like, hey, uh, you know, you're about to have a break, but we need to talk to you before you go.

Steve

Well, he's basically said because Yeah, a guy comes to him and says like, hey, Captain Dukes, like, uh, the colonel needs to see you. He found out you're going to Hong Kong, right? He wants to talk to you. And it's clear that like, that's not— like, Frank would be in trouble, basically, is the idea.

Nic

Uh, so Frank, so he, he takes off running, right? So he, he just sprints out of the army very easily in his uniform, um, and just, you know, and by the time they look for him, you know, he's gone. Like, there's not much of a chase of, of Frank Dukes there.

Steve

No, because he ends up, uh, at this house, uh, which is, you know, he knocks on the front door and, and, and, you know, it's Obviously a place he knows well. An older woman answers the door, and like, they embrace. It's clear they know each other. And we see this little shrine in the front room. It's got like a katana and like its little candles and like stuff. And he stares at that pensively for the next 10 minutes while we get a huge flashback to his childhood.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

Where a couple friends of his and Frank break into this house, this house we're in, and like start playing with the katana and the scabbard, and basically, you know, plan to steal it, but then don't. His friends leave when people start moving in the house and leave him there. And he doesn't jump back out the window.

Nic

No, he's just standing there holding the katana.

Steve

Which is— he's holding the scabbard. He's not even holding the sword. It's like just the scabbard part. But basically, like, a kid and an old man come out— not an old man, like a middle-aged man come out, and the kid kicks him in the stomach. Turns out this is this family that lives there, the dad and the son who live there. And they basically— oh, the first thing— hold on a second, real quick, because it doesn't actually matter, I have to mention it's hilarious to me that young Frank Dux climbs through that window wearing outfit pieces from 2 different projects. Professional teams called the Giants. He's got a New York Giants shirt and a San Francisco Giants hat.

Nic

That is an absolutely on-location telling the props guy, get me 2 Giants things.

Steve

It's crazy. It is so funny to me.

Nic

I just want to talk about, um, about young Frank. Oh, and, and at the end of the whole sequence of him like trying to steal the sword and the little kid kicks him, and then the old guy just slices the brim of his hat off with the sword.

Steve

For no good reason, which is a great move.

Nic

Young Frank Dux is the dopiest looking guy. He has one of those like Eli Manning faces.

Steve

Oh, good.

Nic

Like just a real kind of whatever. So I just— I already can't stand looking at his face. And then when he starts talking, it is unbelievably shitty because like you said, uh, before the plot, they have to establish that he will end up sounding like Jean-Claude Van Damme someday. So the kid has to have this accent. And it is an accent.

Steve

It's something.

Nic

This— I hate this actor, this casting decision. So look, this real human, God bless him. I hope he's having a wonderful life far away from cinema. But I want to apologize actually to, to the actor Dan Futterman, who played Val, the son in the movie The Birdcage, because that I thought was the most I could hate a casting decision. Young Frank Dux blows it out of the fucking water. So yeah, like you said, we're in it like a 10-minute montage of young Frank Dukes. And at first he's just kind of like the punching dummy for the little kid. Yeah, like he's, he's getting trained in a very like lopsided seeming way.

Steve

Yeah. And, and real quick, just on this kid, when, when, when he first jumped through the window, I thought to myself, oh, that's young Frank. He's not going to talk at all because they never would have gotten to get an actor to sound like he'll end up being Jean-Claude Van Damme with that voice. And this character at this age is like maybe 13, I want to say, give or take, right? If, if he— if his family just relocated from Belgium or France or wherever they sound like they're from, right? And I know Van Damme himself is Belgian, but like, you know, it's basically like a French accent is what we're hearing, right? And both parents have it because the— this, this mentor teacher character talks to the parents about martial science and how important it is to teach our children. Just like you grow a vine— they must be from France because they don't grow a lot of wine in Belgium. So, right, you grow vines, I grow children is sort of his thing. Like, you got to use science. They let him talk. It was awful. And I also wonder if they had relocated to the US at his— at that age where, you know, he's under 13 when he relocates, would his accent still be as thick as Jean-Claude Van Damme's accent as an adult, having like lived in America for that long? It seems unlikely. Like, I get some accents are very, you know, they stick with you for a long time. And I've met kids with accents, don't get me wrong, but it just felt like weird. They really shouldn't have had him talk. It would've been much better if he didn't. Yeah.

Nic

And I do wonder if the actor, if that was his accent or if they were having this guy do it.

Steve

Because it was really, I really feel terrible if that's really just what that kid sounded like. But it will also explain why he looks like such a dope because they weren't casting the look; they were casting the voice. Yeah, and had to go with whatever they got.

Nic

Yeah, he does not look like Van Damme, a young Van Damme in any way whatsoever.

Steve

Skull shape is completely crazy, crazy different. But anyway, we should move off of young Frank because he's not worth it.

Nic

So now, so Tanaka is kind of explaining to the the parents that he wants to train Frank. Uh, there's a cutscene of them at school. So Frank is obviously in school with this, uh, Tanaka's son, who's a younger boy, and he's getting bullied, and Frank steps in and in like a very shitty-looking way, like kicks and beats up the bullies, right? So he's gaining a little respect, right?

Steve

I do like one of the kids in that scene behind him who's just watching the fight is wearing a Bartles and James t-shirt. It looks like a giveaway. It's so bad.

Nic

I love that stuff. It's so funny in the old things where you see someone wearing like a Virginia Slims hat. That's a 10-year-old.

Steve

Um, the fucking '80s, man. I don't know.

Nic

So in this montage, we see that, that the son, uh, Mr. Tanaka's actual son who'd been training with Frank over these years, dies. Yeah, uh, looks like a military, uh, thing.

Steve

I think he died in the Kumite. I think because it would— we see him talk about going to fight Kumite for his dad, and then he doesn't come back. It's kind of what it seemed like to me. All right.

Nic

Yeah, uh, terrible sad dad acting. I mean, really unbelievably bad.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And Tanaka's supposed to be this like ancient old man, and he's probably like 41 in real life. It's crazy.

Steve

They never show him with any gray hair, even in present day. When he's like on his deathbed. No, not a gray hair in his mustache or his head. I will say the choice to give his family background that they were nuked in Hiroshima was like, that's a hell of a choice. But he's basically like, oh, I was in the war and while I was away, my family, my son and my daughter, my wife were killed. They were in Hiroshima. It's like, holy fuck, dude. Like, that is brutal. How are you even— how— why would you even be in the United States at that point?

Nic

Seriously, I'd probably pick a different place. Anywhere else.

Steve

Good Lord.

Nic

Um, so as they're— as we're seeing, like, the, the training is kind of stepping up, right? So Frank Dux is being, uh, tasked with very Mr. Miyagi style things, you know. Um, one of the things Tanaka is just reaching into a koi pond and pulling out a fish with his hand. Uh, and then they've got him, uh, Frank Dux is in blindfolds.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

They're training him on, like, you know, how to work without his eyesight. He does the splits a lot. He's being attacked with weapons. Um, so yeah, they're really pounding the shit out of this guy.

Steve

Well, and it's funny because they do the koi grab and they do the blindfold stuff and they set all that up, and that all does come back. But the funny part is when those things come back in the story and become meaningful, they give us a flashback to these scenes. We get to see these scenes again just to remind us, remember, he grabbed fish out of the koi pond and fought blindfolded. Don't forget that. Okay, now let's move on. And it's just like, it's so like holding your hand through the plot, which is hilarious because there's very little plot in this movie.

Nic

Absolutely.

Steve

To begin with.

Nic

No, this is, this is a series of And when he's training, he like—.

Steve

There's a few things I just noticed that are just kind of budget and maybe Van Damme's age and experience. But it's like, you know, he falls before being hit a couple times pretty clearly, where he's reacting to a punch that is still on its way. It's a very funny moment when he goes to punch Tanaka. Tanaka just does a very simple duck and one step, and Van Damme looks like he has seen a ghost or like a man disappeared. He's so surprised. He's so surprised that Tanaka's not there anymore, and it's like bro moved at like a reasonably good pace. He wasn't even that fast. Yeah, very, very funny.

Nic

He's got Tanaka's got him strung up between these trees.

Steve

Bondage.

Nic

Each of his extremities is tied to a rope and tied to these two trees, and he's being spread apart. And then the thing that Frank does to show that he's finally strong enough is he's able to like pull himself up, and he pulls so hard that he just like. Starts breaking the little brackets.

Steve

Yeah, the cleats pull out of the thing or whatever. I struggled with this a bit because at the same— there were 2 thoughts in my head at the same time watching this little display, right? One is clearly that requires a shit ton of strength. I could never remotely do anything like this. I'm not trying to say, look, oh, that's easy. No, it's obviously a clear sign of strength. But also, I don't care. Like, why do I care? What's he gonna do now? Now you're just tied— you're rope— you're still tied by rope to like this other thing. You haven't like broken out. Like, it's just like, why was this the exercise? It's just very strange.

Nic

I mean, I think, I think he had in his contract, I do the splits 5 times in this movie for an extended period of time.

Steve

I marked 5. Okay, yeah, um, I was trying to count.

Nic

Uh, so, so at the end of this, this mostly excruciating, uh, flashback sequence, yeah, uh, Frank is, is awarded his own sword. Yes, right. So he's graduated and everything, and then it cuts back to him just like still in that living room like, and he's looking at this picture. It's like Why do we do it this way?

Steve

Yeah, it's so— and there were 2 or 3 times during the flashback that we cut back to Frank's face just to remind us all, remember, he's a flashback. I think it happened right when in the flashback Jean-Claude Van Damme started playing Frank, like, because we went from Frank the young kid, and then in the flashback we got to where now Frank is a young man, younger than he is present day, but it's now him, right?

Nic

That's when he had his head replacement surgery.

Steve

Exactly, his jaw reconstruction. And so we had to flash forward again to like remind us all, hey, he's still standing in that, you know, this is not now, this is before. It's this Movie is holding your hand through every moment, and it's holding your hand through the simplest plot that has ever been put on film. But that's okay; they kind of knew who their audience was, and they didn't want anybody asking any questions. I get it. But this is where I've noticed really that it was like why is Tanaka not have a single gray hair? Did you not have like hair dye in the budget?

Nic

Old at all? He wasn't even acting that old. No, he's just laying down.

Steve

Yeah, that's it.

Nic

So so now we're in Hong Kong, right? We've traveled to Hong Kong for the Kumite. Frank is. Successfully— he talked to Tanaka saying, I'm gonna go to the Kumite, you know, be careful, whatever, I'm doing it for you, what it is kind of shit. Yeah. He meets the other American there, or one of the other Americans, this guy Ray Jackson.

Steve

Yeah, Donald Gibb.

Nic

Donald Gibb. We've seen him in a lot of '80s stuff.

Steve

Every time I see him, no matter what I see him in, I literally— I think my first note, one of my first notes in the book for this one was, hey, it's Ogre. Yeah, because every time I see him, I think of Ogre from Revenge of the Nerds.

Nic

Yeah, absolutely. And his fighting style is Is I drink beer and like motorcycles, and I'm big.

Steve

His fighting style is Hulk smash, I guess. Yeah, technically is like.

Nic

I looked up shit. There was something about his fighting style, and it had this name to it. I was like, what? I've never heard of that.

Steve

Interesting.

Nic

And basically, the definition of the style was whatever, no holds barred.

Steve

Oh, this is this is Fezzik from *The Princess Bride*. Andre the Giant is like his way is not very sporting. Like yeah, not sportsmanlike.

Nic

And And he's getting like— you're getting some information about the Kumite, like how it works. Like they have a handler kind of guy.

Steve

Yeah, yeah.

Nic

Who's a really cool looking character. I like his—.

Steve

I like him.

Nic

Kind of mulleted, like half tint glasses, tracksuit, gold chain. My kind of guy.

Steve

Were those glasses prescription? Because they were shaped like aviator sunglasses, but they weren't particularly dark. So I guess those were just his glasses.

Nic

Yeah, they were those like half tint.

Steve

Those are really interesting.

Nic

Yeah, yeah. Uh, big back then, but yeah.

Steve

Jackson and Frank play a video game together briefly in like the hotel bar or something maybe. And the thing I noticed about it is it kind of— it didn't look like any game I know. It didn't look exactly like any game I remember. Maybe it was, or maybe they— I don't know what they did, but there were no buttons. They each had 2 joysticks, and it was like one of them must have been the kick and punch sort of stuff, and the other one was move and jump, I guess. But it was very weird to see them both with, you know, each hand on a joystick moving them left, right, up, down, left, right, whatever.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

And then it was like, I don't remember any video game like 2 joysticks. Well, Super Smash TV. Yeah, but that was different. I agree, but I'm more like this because the reason Super Smash TV worked is because you could shoot in 360 degrees around you, right? It was top-down, so you had to be able to shoot every direction. So one stick was the shooter and one was you moving, right? That kind of thing. But this is like a side-to-side fighting.

Nic

Leg can go in any direction. Yeah, I forgot to look up what game this is. I don't know if it was like Karate Champ or just one of those kind of generic things because I think it also wasn't in English.

Steve

And yeah, it's on the screen. Looked like a little bit like if you took the old Kung Fu NES game and turned it into a PvP kind of fighting game versus like a level thing. It kind of looked like that, but it definitely was— it's definitely something else. It must, it must have been a Chinese or Japanese game we didn't get here or something, maybe. Right.

Nic

Yeah. Uh, and so Frank and, uh, Ray Jackson are playing this. They're kind of very fast friends there. Um, Frank beats Ray at it and is like, you want to go again? You know, so they're all excited. Uh, meantime, the government is just like a couple steps behind Frank, so they're— they've shown up to Tanaka's house And, uh, and the— there's 2 agents. I don't know one of the actors. One is Forest Whitaker and the other, the other guy, but they're the kind of 2 guys in pursuit of Frank Dukes throughout this movie.

Steve

And it's the classic, uh, when you want to put 2 officials in something where they're not really meant to be like drivers of the plot, but they are meant to be there to sort of like be a ticking clock. Yeah. Is that one of them is like young and reckless and the other one is old and calm. I feel like that happens. It's basically the 48 Hours Yeah, recipe, you know what I mean? For sure. And so Forrest Whitaker is always trying to be a little bit more of a hard-ass, kind of like whatever. And the old white guy is kind of like, which is another— I gotta be honest with you, another racist-coded thing to me in this was the way that the, like, the, the older white agent was constantly like correcting or like calming down the younger Black man.

Nic

Yeah, yeah, you're a little too angry to do this, or you're too excited about the food. There's a scene where the two of them are eating and Forrest Whitaker's like, oh, this stuff is great, right? And the other guy's like, oh, I wouldn't touch this stuff.

Steve

There's a lot of racially coded— very enthusiastic.

Nic

Fantastic. Yeah. Um, so we got these guys, uh, kind of coming after them.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

They're being led now, uh, and their handler, this guy's named Mr. Lin, and he's kind of telling them about the Kumite. It happens once every 5 years, and there's no holds barred, and it takes place over 3 days. Full contact, just laying out. Yeah, yeah. A blend of styles and all this stuff. And, you know, this guy's the champion. Chong Li is the guy who's the champion from last year. Um, this, this line, like, they are about to enter, like, the, the bowels of this area where they're led to the Kumite. And we get a very large, uh, man who goes, uh, okay, USA. And then, uh, Ray Jackson repeats it. That's like a very, um, you know, common line from this movie. But this part— okay, here's something we discussed in a previous episode.

Steve

Okay.

Nic

When we did the episode on the movie Jacob's Ladder.

Steve

Okay.

Nic

There was one of these nightmare sequences where he was being led down this hallway.

Steve

Yeah. And we—.

Nic

And with all this really weird gross stuff happening. And we thought maybe that's what was used, uh, to inspire the movie Beerfest.

Steve

That's right.

Nic

Where they're going down the hall. I think the Beer Fest thing is almost one-for-one the Bloodsport trek into the Kumite. So I gotta watch Beer Fest again, like, side by side with this. But I think it was inspired by this, like, walkthrough and all this weird shit they see on the way into the Kumite arena.

Steve

The funny part is, or the interesting thing to me about it, was when they started walking through this, I thought, I thought to myself, man, I wonder, was this meant to look like Kowloon Walled City? Is that like what this was sort of based off of? And I looked it up and no, no, no, that they filmed in Kowloon Walled City, which is a— was always a part of Hong Kong that was basically an unregulated— there's no law in there.

Nic

Right.

Steve

It's absolutely—.

Nic

And they did explain that a little bit, right? Yeah.

Steve

And it's like, this was one of— I read this is one of the only Western film productions that ever filmed in Kowloon Walled City before it was torn down in the mid-'90s. I think the Chinese government tore it down after they got Hong Kong back from the UK. And so it's gone now. It has been for years. But like, this was an interesting thing. I thought to myself, that is such a cool, like, historical artifact sort of that they're able to film in that actual place.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

And keep that forever. Now the set where the, where the battles took place was not physically there. That was on a soundstage. But they filmed those scenes of him walking— any scene that was filmed walking down those aisles or whatever, that was all done on one day in Kowloon Walled City for real. And so yeah, very cool stuff in that sense. Um, one of the only reasons I even know what Kowloon Walled City is is that there was a hardcore punk band called Kowloon Walled City that I listened to for a while.

Nic

Oh, nice.

Steve

And I remember looking it up once going, why are they called that? I wonder what this is. And like going down a Wikipedia rabbit hole about it. But yeah, so very cool. And yeah, maybe you're absolutely right, the You know, the whole Beerfest reference thing is, I think, probably a mixture along with just any kind of labyrinthine, you know, kind of thing. Definitely could have taken some inspiration from this.

Nic

Yeah. And they get— and I love that bit about the Kowloon Walled City because this is a place that in real life conceivably could have actually had something like this going on.

Steve

Yep.

Nic

Um, almost like a, like a tanker ship, like in international waters, but it's on land.

Steve

Yellowstone's zone of death.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

You can't empanel a jury.

Nic

Um, so they get into the Kumite arena and each, uh, each participant, I guess, has a physical invitation.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

And then they also have to show, like, show you're the guy, like, qualify.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

Show us in some way, right? And, uh, and Frank Dux's thing that he does is there's these stacks of bricks, you know, like 7, 8 bricks, like 3 stacks of them. And, uh, his move is called the Dim Mak, which is like the touch of death or something like that, right?

Steve

Right.

Nic

And, uh, they say, okay, break one of these bricks. And, you know, pick a brick, whatever. And they decide he's gonna break the bottom brick. So he has to to hit through the top of a stack of bricks without damaging the first 6 and just exploding the bottom brick, uh, which he does easily because it's easy to do.

Steve

Like, untouched. The bricks above barely move.

Nic

It turns into like sand. It doesn't— it doesn't just slightly crack. Like, it blows the fuck up.

Steve

It's like Walter throwing Donnie off the cliff and blowing it back in the dude's face. It is just dust. Like, it's so bad.

Nic

Ray Jackson is covered in brick dust.

Steve

Exactly.

Nic

And, uh, and now we see, uh, Chong Li, played by the great Bolo Yeung, just an enormous, uh, Chinese actor who's really like— he's appeared in a lot of martial arts things. And, uh, he's like the intimidating guy. And he looks at him and he's not impressed. And he goes, brick don't hit back.

Steve

That's a good— he makes a good point though.

Nic

Yeah, he does. Although it hit Ray Jackson in the face when the bits of it started flying around. So, um, so now the, the military, uh, pursuit gentlemen, Forrest Whitaker and the other guy, are coordinating now with like Hong Kong police.

Steve

Yep.

Nic

And they're trying to get in with these authorities, and the Hong Kong police is kind of doing the, doing the like kumite. I don't have no idea what you're talking about. I've never heard of that. That's not a real thing. So they're not being like super helpful.

Steve

Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Nic

But they've agreed at least, like, now they know that Frank Dukes is someone that we're looking for here.

Steve

Quickly about Chong Li, because first of all, I think it's funny watching this movie and realizing how much of a direct inspiration Street Fighter II took from it and then named a character Chun-Li.

Nic

Yeah, yeah.

Steve

Right, which is a female character. But like, similarly, the other thing is, is that so Bolo Yeung, I believe, is a— was— I don't know if he's still alive actually, but a Chinese man.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

And Chong Li sounds like a Chinese name, like naming conventions, but he is clearly a Korean character because he has the flag of South Korea on his headband. So it's like a very weird, like, yet another example in my opinion of like this movie just not giving a shit about any of that kind of accuracy.

Nic

We needed one non-white person to review some stuff.

Steve

We're gonna need super accuracy when it comes to like explaining how these things work, but when it comes to like that kind of stuff, like cultural shit, like who fucking cares? Like it was very dismissive of that because I'm watching the whole time going, Chong Li does not sound like a Korean name to me. And maybe I look, if Listener, if you are aware of why that should sound like a Korean name to me— to me it sounds like a Chinese name. It sounds like a made-up name, obviously, but it sounds more Chinese in origin. Maybe I'm wrong and I could be corrected, but like, it's weird to me that this character was played as a Korean. Yeah, why didn't they just make him Chinese?

Nic

Maybe he killed a Korean guy and took his bandana or something.

Steve

Sure, I guess that's the only—.

Nic

But yeah, it's a good point.

Steve

Uh, it's a little strange.

Nic

Bolo Yeung, if you're still alive, uh, please hit us up at thisshow@2dads1movie.com. That's the number 2 and the number 1.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

Um, there— so there's, there's a note that I made here that's kind of in the spirit of like, what the fuck here? Okay, so back at the hotel, so there's a reporter here, this woman reporter who's here to like learn about the Kumite, right? I gotta, I gotta get some info. And she kind of knows where the guys are, but nobody's giving her any information. So anyone she mentions it to is like, get out of here. So now she's back and she's talking to one of these guys who I think in, in a Aside from young Frank Dukes, is the worst actor in this movie. And this is the guy who plays the character Hussein, which again, they fucked this up big time. This guy's real name is not— he's in no way like Middle Eastern or Arab at all. And the way that they made him Arab is they just put, uh, they put the headgear on him, kaftan or whatever it's called, or something. And then, and then like when he fights, he doesn't wear it. So like we get this whole scene of him showing down against, uh, Van Damme later, and he's not wearing— he's hard to recognize. This guy's a terrible actor. His dialogue is so bad. And I wrote down with a star on it, you better be good at fucking karate. Like, if you're this bad of an actor, you better do some good martial science later on because— yeah, uh, because I don't trust it.

Steve

Spoiler alert, did he live up to that for you, Nic?

Nic

Absolutely not. No, no, I don't think he did a move.

Steve

I agree with you.

Nic

He was there for his acting.

Steve

He was there to be the guy Frank knocks out quickly, right? Wasn't that sort of— yeah. His character's name is Sadiq Hussein. They put him in traditional garb of, like, the Arab Peninsula, more so than, you know, the Fertile Valley, more so than Iraq-Iran kind of thing. Like, there's, like, all kinds of inconsistencies here, but it was clear they were going for a Saddam Hussein. I mean, 'cause Saddam Hussein was a known quantity in the late '80s, you know? I mean, it's not— he hadn't invaded Kuwait yet, but, you know, people would've known who he was.

Nic

Yeah, yeah.

Steve

So it feels like a direct reference to that, but, like, then all of the little details. And I also get the sense that we were supposed to accept his existence as an Arab character because of the gold tooth. Was that like supposed to be an indicator because he's got money? He's got that oil money, I guess. Yeah, so weird.

Nic

And well, I think the, the main reason— back to the racism, uh, the, the main reason we can tell that he's an Arab character according to the filmmakers, not according to me, is that he is unbelievably disrespectful towards this woman. And he's trying to, uh, he's trying to bring her like back to his room. He's like, yeah, I'll tell you about the kimchi, come with me. Basically doing everything but throwing her over his shoulder and walking away with her.

Steve

Oh my God.

Nic

Um, so Frank Duke sees this happening. He comes up. Clearly, you know, this is, this is Wyatt Earp not letting the horse get slapped around.

Steve

That's right.

Nic

Right. So Frank Duke sees this happening and he says, all right, we're gonna do it. We're— I have a challenge for you. You know, you put a quarter in your hand, and if I can grab it out of your hand before you close your hand, she stays with me. You leave her the hell alone.

Steve

Right.

Nic

And if I can't grab it, go ahead and take her.

Steve

Which is— So she's like, Like, does she have any say in this? This is a crazy—.

Nic

I mean, it's like if my wife is about to get kidnapped and I'm like, if I can do a backflip, I've never tried it before, but I think— like, what the hell?

Steve

Uh, Genie's screwed if you have to do a backflip, buddy. There's nothing—.

Nic

I'm done, dude. Um, so, uh, so of course Frank Dukes ends up snatching this quarter. He thinks that he didn't snatch the quarter out of his hand because he's Like, and he opens his hand and he has, oh, you've replaced it with a different coin, right?

Steve

Yeah, yeah.

Nic

So, uh, so Frank Dukes, you know, then he wins dinner with the girl because it's not just like, hey, I saved— like, she has to give you something. You can't just save a person, right?

Steve

Can't just be altruistic. Like, so yeah, so they have dinner together and I think this is where she asks him to like help her get into the Kumite, right? And he's just like, I can't, like, they're too secretive about it, I can't get it in. She later gets in with absolute ease, just walking in with somebody and absolutely nothing. And the number of people that end up just walking into the audience of this tournament near the end, it's like, wait, why are any of these people allowed to be here?

Nic

Totally. I mean, it is, it is one of these events and we'll see it in a minute. But it's one of these events where people, which I love, people are just waving cash in the air and then exchanging it, you know, at the end of it.

Steve

It's just weird that they threw cash on a dude who lost. The guy gets knocked out and they just throw cash at him.

Nic

I mean, I get it's like a disrespectful looking thing, but it is funny that it's like, he lost, guys. Like, don't give him your money.

Steve

He lost.

Nic

Uh, so we've got the Kumite is about to start. Frank Dux is in his hotel room and, uh, and Ray Jackson comes in to get him. Frank Dux is doing the splits between 2 chairs for a very long period of time. And, uh, and Ray Jackson's like, hey man, come on, it's time to go. And he's already drinking his beer. He's got, he's got his beer like first thing in the morning.

Steve

Yep.

Nic

Um, again, just, you know, mandatory splits. Yeah, we had to have Uh, so we get some explanation about the Kumite. It happens every 5 years. It's 3 days. There's 1 winner. There's 3 ways to win: knockout, someone can tap out, or you can push them outside of the arena. And it's kind of like slanted on 2 sides. Like, it's pretty big. It's not a small space.

Steve

Was it that way the whole time? 'Cause I remember really seeing that in the final battle, but I didn't think it was always slanted like that.

Nic

I would imagine that on the faraway shots, it's always like that. But there's probably a lot of close-up action shots where they're absolutely not on a slanted thing.

Steve

Interesting.

Nic

Okay.

Steve

I just maybe didn't notice. But yeah, that's Yeah, interesting. There was a point where I wrote a note down saying like, wait, why is this like— why does it look like a really weak skateboard vert ramp now?

Nic

Yeah, yeah.

Steve

Because it's just like raised on the ends and not— but anyway, but yeah, so we learn a lot about it. We see a couple of battles. We get— I think Jackson does the title drop and says like, that's why they call it Bloodsport. Exactly right. It's like, okay, thanks. Um, when Chong Li does his fight, I couldn't tell right away if he'd killed the person that he fought. It looks like he didn't because they make a big deal about it when someone does die near the end. So I thought— but he almost kind of— they made a point to tell people, like, people have died. It doesn't sound like it's the kind of thing where it's like all the time people die, or like every year people die, but like people have died in the ring.

Nic

Yes.

Steve

And so, and then it looks like Chong Li maybe kills a dude, like really fucks him up. So at that moment, I will tell you something that the, the screenwriters and the director and everybody put into my head that they never paid off, and I will never forgive them for.

Nic

Okay.

Steve

I assumed at that moment Chong Li was going to kill Ray Jackson.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

That's at that point when Chong Li almost kills the first person we see him fight, right? And you've made it clear to us that people have died. Mine— I am now expecting for Jackson to be killed so that Frank has someone to avenge, right?

Nic

We're plugging the stakes into the formula, and that's exactly what would happen.

Steve

Chekhov's dead best friend.

Nic

Yes. Um, and, and Chong Li— so he, you know, he ends up, uh, he ends up— oh, Ray Jackson went against like the least scary guy I've ever seen and just like punched him in the face immediately. And then he turns to Chong Li For no reason other than Chong Li's the defending champion, he's like, "I'm gonna kill you, man." So especially that's what I think when I wrote it down. That happens. Chong Li comes in, and then it's a world record win. So world record time. It's amazing. People are going, "Chong Li, Chong Li," and when he's like responding to it, he's moving his arms at the weirdest like intervals. Like it's not going along with the chant at all. I don't understand it.

Steve

It's like they told him. Raise your fists in the air in victory, and he had never seen anyone do that.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

So he was like guessing what they meant, and nobody corrected him because he's Bolo Yeung and he's enormous.

Nic

Yeah. Um, um, so Frank Dux comes in, and he comes in against Hussein, who you know the bad actor. We're gonna see some awesome martial science from him. And of course, he doesn't even throw a single move; gets knocked out by Frank Dux immediately. And then Frank Dux has the new record.

Steve

Yes, that's right.

Nic

And now this could be a hashtag because I feel like it's come up a couple times. Yeah, so Hussein's gold tooth is now on the mat, and the kid who comes up to like wipe the blood off the mat between things gets a very greedy, mischievous look on his face and picks up the tooth. And of course you got to chomp into that because it just came out of this sicko's mouth.

Steve

That's so weird. But like, are you specifically talking about losing a gold tooth or the biting on something to test if it's real? Because those are 2 different things that happen a lot.

Nic

Those should both probably happen because I'm thinking about the Home Alone gold tooth.

Steve

That's the first I thought of.

Nic

Yeah, right. And I feel like there's another one, uh, in there, but yeah. Funny end to the character, but also like, what a useless, unimpressive. Like the we've had three very quick, almost like a single strike knockouts here, right?

Steve

But I do. I will say in the defense of that choice, because I I kind of I kind of I see what you're saying, and and I do think especially as a first time viewer, I was like, man, I thought these battles would be these fights would be like more to them kind of thing. The fact that the movie does give us in later scenes much more involved bouts, it's like oh no, these are we're trying to set here that not everybody in this tournament is really up to Jackson and. Frank and Chong Li's talent level. There are others. Paco is a character that does a bunch of ass whooping, and there's a couple of other Asian characters that really do great stuff. So there's like a— we're getting this idea that there's this, you know, subset within the fighters of like, well, these are the particularly good ones. So like later when Frank has to fight Paco after we see him whoop somebody's ass, it's like, oh, there's an— there's actual danger here. Like this is not some idiot like Hossein. This is somebody Frank actually has to fight. So I do enjoy that they're giving us scrubs out of the way here. Scrubs out of the way. Show You know, don't just tell us, show us that Chong Li and Frank and Ray Jackson can really just whoop ass. They are a level above some of these guys. Yeah, so that it raises the stakes appropriately. So I'm okay with these first ones being quick because most of this movie is fight scenes. Yeah, and most of them are more involved and have more action.

Nic

So that's fair. Yeah, that's fair. And then, you know, right after this last fight of Duke's against Hussein, we get a pretty good montage just showing kind of the first day of action. Good clashes of styles. There's like there's Chong Li, then there's this other like really big tall kind of sumo guy whose move is snapping somebody over his knee, which wow that brutal oh looks very very rough.

Steve

And this is the Kumite song, I believe, right?

Nic

During this sequence survive. Yeah, so this was Stan.

Steve

What's the guy's name? Stan Bush. Stan love Stan Bush.

Nic

Oh, we are Stan Bush stans. Yes, exactly.

Steve

I think The Touch is one of the best eighties eighties songs ever, man.

Nic

I think Stan Bush stan is the country that Hussein was supposed to be. From.

Steve

And that's Stan Bush then.

Nic

Um, yeah, so we got a good, a good montage. Um, and the, the military guys have, have located Frank.

Steve

Yes.

Nic

Right, so he's kind of back at his hotel and they found him and they're, you know, we're gonna— we're taking you back. And they point their tasers at him and he goes and takes off, right? So we get kind of a chase through the streets.

Steve

Those tasers, by the way, they look like dust blasters. They're crazy looking. Like just absolutely enormous. And I know it's like it's 1988, but they're enormous.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

And yeah, they look like those yeah those dustbusters that you would attach to the wall.

Nic

Yes.

Steve

Before when you had to take the battery off for them.

Nic

Do you think they charge like that?

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

Where they plug into the wall?

Steve

Hundred percent. They're hooked on.

Nic

Take off your taser off the wall on the way out.

Steve

Yeah. Make sure you grab something from the taser wall, guys. Don't don't forget your tasers. So crazy.

Nic

So we get a little chase through the streets.

Steve

Yeah.

Nic

Um, and it's good. I mean, just kind of very lighthearted, like goofy stuff.

Steve

Keystone cops, dude. It's so bad. This whole chase.

Nic

Well, I mean, that's kind of the idea of it though.

Steve

But like there opportunities.

Nic

For probably more action and more, uh, jokes. But again, dude, a million and a half budget. Like, they did focus it in one place here.

Steve

That's true. And, and it's just— but to some of the, like, ways in which Dukes is escaping, like running around the side of a car, like peeking over things, and just like, like at one point they're running through a really narrow alley and he stops and turns around and they are like on top of him to the point that when he then turns to run towards the camera again, both of the pursuing actors have to pretend to stumble in order to not end up on top of him because he waited way too long to do it. And it's little things like that where I'm like, man, this just makes it— it's sort of like when there's the fight choreography and Van Damme reacts to a punch that hasn't even come yet. It's kind of like, yeah, this is like the one thing that's actually good at. Yeah, this is the one thing this movie should be good at. It's like fight choreography, like chase action stuff. And it kind of— this chase left me wanting.

Nic

So, so it ends with the The pursuers end up like falling off one of these boats, right?

Steve

So Frank is like, "Oh, see you later." And of course has to get their attention and like salute them or whatever before just leaving. It's like, and he told them, "Look, I'll come back with you, but the airplane—the plane—the plane ride's in two days. I gotta finish this tournament." Yeah, like I'm not coming back now, but I'll meet you at the airport in two days. Like he's trying to be like reasonable-ish, right?

Nic

Because they—I mean realistically, unless this is an illegal thing and you could say any U.S. citizen could be arrested for doing this thing, I don't know what grounds the military has when he's on his time off. Off to prevent him from this. But hey, as we know, uh, we'll get to— Frank Dukes is very decorated, very valuable member of the armed forces.

Steve

We have to get into that.

Nic

Um, he, uh, Frank now is having his dinner date with the reporter.

Steve

Yep.

Nic

And, um, sleeps over. And the day before a fight-to-the-death, no-holds-barred tournament, maybe I'm just gonna try to pop in a Hungry-Man and get to bed early. Like, yeah, he's, he's up, he's humping all night and doing the splits and And I mean, uh, again, another scene, uh, has to show him getting dressed in the morning, and we get the glutes. They could have shown the camera after he pulled his pants up, but we got a full-ass scene. Yep. Again, definitely in his contract for sure.

Steve

Oh yeah. So then she asks him again, you know, can you get me in? And he's like, no, I really can't. I'm sorry. Like, I'm so sorry. So then he arrives at the Kumite, and she shows up with some rich Asian guy. She's just there.

Nic

You just dress like Vanna White, they let you in.

Steve

Yeah, exactly. It's very Vanna White, very evening gown.

Nic

And she's like, she didn't try that first. It's like, oh, instead of getting almost like kidnapped and assaulted by all these professional punchers, right? Like, you could have just put earrings on and gotten in there.

Steve

She also says something to him as she sees Frank. She says like, it's not the first time I had to go undercover to get a story. And it's like, so wait, are you telling me that if Frank had brought you, you would have just told everyone there, I'm a journalist, Frank brought me? You both would have been killed.

Nic

Yeah, yeah, you would have had to go undercover anyway.

Steve

If you could have just been an undercover fake call girl for some rich business, why didn't you do that first? Yeah, it's like, I don't know, but it's— she did— no time has passed. Like, he leaves and she is there within minutes of him arriving. Yeah, so no time. So she must have had this in her back pocket, I guess. But she is—.

Nic

She was as close to him walking into the Kumite as the cops were chasing him down the alley a minute ago.

Steve

Exactly.

Nic

Um, so again, we've got another decent, uh, montage here, and Uh, Chong Li, at one point he breaks somebody's leg, you know, compound fracture. That's a really rough one.

Steve

That's like the one kind of major special effect, I think, in the movie.

Nic

Kind of the only real injury. Um, and we kind of see a continued accumulation of blood on the mat. Yeah, it's getting wiped off, but it's definitely getting stained. So this is kind of showing us what's going around. Uh, we get the sumo guy against the, the hopping around, uh, racist caricature guy. One thing I would like, uh, during this whole sequence is maybe just a quick flash to like the Yeah, you know, you never really see that. I think that the logic of the way these fights actually are, the bracket would have been too tough to do. They didn't have enough guys to work with.

Steve

It would have been a level of detail that, while it would have been kind of nice to see, like in Karate Kid, right, where they're moving the placard names around and stuff, it is a level of detail that this movie has not put into any other parts of its plot. So it really would have kind of been a lot of work, I think, to get it quite right.

Nic

Well, the guy had matching Giants gear on at the beginning of it.

Steve

Amazing. I just love it because there's not a single person on the planet that I could think of who would be a fan of both the New York and San Francisco Giants. Like, what would have had to happen in your life that that was your 2 teams?

Nic

Yeah, I have no idea.

Steve

It's like you're both members of The Parent Trap, that we're both twins. Yeah, Parent Trap at once.

Nic

So Frank Dux ends up against the big sumo guy and he takes him out. One of the things that Frank, you know, it established he was doing this Like this touch of death punch where he's breaking the bottom brick. So he does that exact punch to this guy's stomach. Yeah, but because he's a big fat evil guy, he just goes ha ha ha ha ha ha. And then, but Frank ends up taking him out.

Steve

He does that's the splits to the nut punch, isn't it? With an uppercut. Like good God, that's brutal.

Nic

I feel like that should get your back turned. Like people should turn their back on you for that move.

Steve

That is like that is like Dalton with the throat rip, right? That is like the good character is now a little less good. Because we've seen this move. Yes, exactly.

Nic

Uh, yeah, so he nut punches him and then just kind of shoves his forehead and like knocks him over.

Steve

Um, Chong Li, uh, goes up against Ray Jackson here, which again, I'm expecting Ray to not survive this bout at this point watching it. That's what I expect. So Ray gets a couple good punches in, whatever, and like knocks Chong Li down, but immediately turns his back on him and starts celebrating. And it's like, bro, like, you can't— like, what are you doing?

Nic

We saw this in Game of Thrones. I mean, this is the thing. This is the Viper, right? You don't do this.

Steve

Sand Viper. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Nic

Uh, yeah, so he's, he's chanting, he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah! And Chong Li gets back up and, uh, and he starts fighting back, and he is really like pounding on Ray while he's down. Like you said, we're, we're bracing ourselves for a character who's like, yeah, we like him, but he's— it's fine if he dies in the scam, in the scheme of this movie.

Steve

If he existed to be the one who dies to give Frank the last boost of like revenge he needs, it would have made perfect sense. I would have— I was totally prepared for that. And he does get badly injured. And even, I've got to tell you, they cut to Frank running onto the Mack, and people are trying to hold him back. You can't do that. But he's gonna make it, whatever. And Chong Li's still got the bandana, the Harley-Davidson bandana that Jackson was wearing, and he keeps it, you know. That's a very thing. But it really looked like, you know, if he dies, he dies, that kind of moment. And then we cut to Jackson awake and in the hospital. He's got a bandage on his head, but he's like fine, basically.

Nic

He could have at least been in a coma or something. He was not.

Steve

Yeah, it's like, give us a chance he might die.

Nic

Yes.

Steve

And let that drive Frank.

Nic

Right.

Steve

No, he's fine.

Nic

Yeah, so very weird. So during this scene, it's really funny. They're visiting, um, they're visiting Ray in the hospital, uh, Frank and the, the reporter. And I keep forgetting her name, but honestly, I don't think that the writers wrote her a name. Um, so as they're doing this and they're talking to Ray Jackson, he's being examined by a doctor who is just moving the stethoscope like a couple inches at a time on his chest every couple seconds for like 2 minutes straight. Like they couldn't just be like, hey, at some point the doctor would be done with this and he'd let you on. Like it's important to know that Ray is getting checked by a doctor here.

Steve

So strange. He didn't need the doctor did not need to be there in the scene. We see him like hooked up to stuff. He's in a hospital bed. Like that's really all the doctor is doing the same work. Yeah. From a storytelling perspective, you know, it's like it's not necessary.

Nic

Yeah. So but Frank's he's determined. I'm going back for the final day of the Kumite. I'm gonna win this thing. Oh, Janice. Dennis is the, uh, the reporter. Oh, okay. Um, yeah, so she's, she's pissed off, right?

Steve

And this is, uh, and so then, yeah, she's like, are you crazy? Like, you can't do this. Like, you got it. He's like, oh, it's for honor. You wouldn't understand. Like, or whatever.

Nic

And it's weird because like he's doing it supposedly to avenge a death, but then he also says, I want to be the first, uh, like American or the first outsider to win or something like that.

Steve

I don't know. I don't know if he's— if he— somebody did mention that he would be the first American. I can't remember. Did he say that, that that was part of his things? I remember him saying stuff about wanting to Tanaka, his mentor, more than anything. Like, that being the driving thing. But yeah, at some point we do hear that, like, if you— because I think Lin tells him, if you, you could be the first American to win this. No American's ever won it or something like that. But I don't— can't remember if that was like something fresh or not driving him or not. But anyway, but there's that. So he heads back to Kowloon Walled City to, to go to the last day of the thing, even though, yeah, Janice or whatever is like screaming at him not to. Like, you know, you'll— if you die, is it worth it kind of thing, right?

Nic

And she goes to snitch on him.

Steve

On him. That's right. She goes and she tells—.

Nic

So she goes for the Hong Kong cops, right, who are in touch with the military guys. So, you know, now that's on her— his radar, and she just wants them to shut down the, uh, the Kumite, to stop it. Yeah, exactly.

Steve

So they— so he goes there and meets the 2, you know, whatever military— I don't know if they're MPs, what the hell they are, some kind of, you know, detectives or whatever. Yeah, Forrest Whitaker and his buddy. And so they're there and they've got the stun guns.

Nic

Oh, before this, real quick, because, um, Frank is having kind of Like, uh, there's a montage.

Steve

Oh, that's right.

Nic

Where he's, he's like—.

Steve

More flashbacks or something?

Nic

Yeah, he's kind of like thinking about the upcoming fight and he's having flashbacks, but all the flashbacks are just exact shots that have already been in the movie of like Chong Li, you know, being like, ho ho ho, or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Rei getting hit and he's like hallucinating about Chong Li and stuff. And then he's up like at the top of the tallest building in the city doing the splits like, like a gargoyle just over the city.

Steve

Some kind of temple or something.

Nic

Yeah, very interesting looking building, but another, another contractually, uh, obligated split. Um, so yeah, now that— now the cops are kind of after Frank, like, on the— in the Kowloon Walled City on the way in.

Steve

Exactly. And they've got their stun guns, and then I think he grabs like a trash can lid, and the stun gun little barbs not only deflect off of that when they try to shoot him, they like hit some of the Hong Kong cops, and then he's able to run away. Something like that.

Nic

This is the, the biggest like give up of the whole movie. So these guys have, have traveled to Hong Kong to chase him down to make sure that he's secured. He's a military asset at the very least, if not like an international criminal depending on what they're going after him for, right?

Steve

They do keep talking about wanting to protect him, that the military is invested a lot in him. If he gets hurt, that's bad for them. That's kind of the angle they've been taking. That's right.

Nic

It's like, like, uh, Colonel Trautman wouldn't want Rambo to do one of these tournaments, right? Exactly. Yep. Um, so then when they go after Frank and he deflects the taser And you— and the Hong Kong cop get hit by the tasers and are immediately like, yeah, we're not part of this anymore. And then the—.

Steve

Fuck all y'all.

Nic

The main— one of the, uh, one of the military guys is like, okay, Frank, you win, but it's wrong what you're doing. And then that's just fucking it for those guys for now. So he ends up— he ends up, uh, running in, and he barely, uh, he barely makes it on time to the Kumite.

Steve

Yeah, yeah.

Nic

Uh, one of the organizers, maybe one of the guys who's running the gambling Looks like he's bribing one of the officials to let Frank in, and the guy's like, "Okay, he can get in." And then he reaches back in and steals the money back that he tried to bribe him.

Steve

He was asking him to like wait. He was like, "Give him five more minutes," whatever. And then as he puts the money in the pocket, Frank shows up, so he pulls it right back out. Like, "Oh look, he's here. It's all good. Don't need to worry about it." So yeah. So now Frank has to fight Paco, which is one of the fighters we saw do rather well earlier in the tournament. He's been around.

Nic

Paco, I don't know the name of the actor. He is in the movie Stone Cold with Brian Bosworth. He's one of the kind of sub-boss bad guys in it.

Steve

So yeah, nice.

Nic

He's He's been among stars before.

Steve

Botsworth is the loftiest of stars, really. That is, that is high.

Nic

Paco does the thing where he tries to do like the handshake fist bump at the beginning but then does a cheap shot. So immediately like turns the table. It's so funny that a guy who like we've been shown he's skilled, he's doing well, like why would he do that at the very beginning? Very strange. Uh, but then there's a scene where it— there's just like 60 mutual side kicks going back and forth.

Steve

They're both like booting each other and not even defending them, just taking the shots in the ribs over and over again.

Nic

Hey, right in my kidney— kidneys, hardest part of my— part of my body. Um, yeah, so Dux ends up winning with a spin kick. This is where we, we start getting some Van Damme really showcasing here, for sure. Um, Chong Li, uh, Chong Li ends up fighting, right? And he of course, uh, takes this guy out very easily. And is kind of holding him down, like doing the, like, should I— what should I do? Should I finish him off? And then punches him in the face in a way that, you know, it's indicated to us, like, that guy's dead. They come and check his pulse and everything. That's right, he's dead.

Steve

So Chong Li killed his opponent holding the hand in front of the nose first to see if he could feel any air and then checking the pulse, because the air thing is much, much more reliable.

Nic

So, um, the punch that Chong Li— it kind of looked weak. Again, budget limitations. It's a weird angle. Yeah, there's a way to make that look better. Uh, you just need an actor who's willing to actually get punched by a giant Chinese bodybuilder.

Steve

Yeah, even, even pulling a punch, that would hurt from, from Bolo Yeung. Yeah. Um, so yeah, so now we're gonna have Frank versus Chong Li for the finals. At this point, I believe the detectives are in the audience, the journalist is in the audience, like everybody's— I think even maybe the captain of the Hong Kong PD stayed with them. I can't remember if he was there or not. Yeah, but like they're all just hanging out. Like, I thought this was secret.

Nic

This is, this is the Blues Brothers final con— uh, concert at the Palace Hotel ballroom where like all the cops and the SWAT team Are all watching them do Sweet Home Chicago. So yeah, and and the elders after Chong Li killed this other fighter, the kind of people in charge of it like stand up and very you know emphatically like turn their backs on solemnly.

Steve

Yeah yeah because and then you went too far.

Nic

Yeah yeah like this isn't what this is about.

Steve

It's not actually precisely what it's about. Yeah it's not actually against the rules. You could actually outlaw it and say hey if you kill somebody you're disqualified. You could make a rule but they didn't so you really shouldn't get mad. Before the fight between Chong Li and Frank, the, the, the, the trainer for Chong Li, or his whatever manager or something, slips something into his waistband that looks like a Rolaids or a Tums or something like that. It's for his ulcer. Yeah, it's for his ulcer. It's very strange.

Nic

Getting kicked in the stomach 100 times in a row gave me an ulcer. But yeah, so, so he slides something in so we know something's up. And then Chong Li is wearing Ray Jackson's Harley-Davidson bandana on his leg.

Steve

That's right.

Nic

Again, I don't know why he didn't just replace his main one.

Steve

Well, he's got to have the Korean flag so we can know that he's bigger, that he's Korean. Yeah, Chong Li. We got to make sure we know he's Korean. So, um, but yeah, and actually that, that punches a hole in the maybe he took it off a guy he killed or beat thing because he would have replaced it with the new one if that was the case, right? So yeah, I think that was his freshest kill on the head.

Nic

Yeah, and then you go down the body.

Steve

You'd think, you'd think.

Nic

Um, Bolo Yeung, I, I love his presence. I love that he exists. Uh, all of his lines suck so bad in this.

Steve

So he's not an actor, like, like, God bless him, but he is a strongman, a bodybuilder. Yeah, not an actor.

Nic

His kind of, uh, his kind of Ivan Drago type line here is, you break my record, now I break you like I break your friend. Like, you gotta, you gotta tighten that up a little bit.

Steve

I don't know, that's compelling.

Nic

Oh, you break my record, now I break you. Cool. Or I'll break you like I break your friend.

Steve

Yeah, cool. Okay, I could see how tightening it up might have been better, but I really think you're just being way too hard on him.

Nic

Should we have added more to it?

Steve

It's— no, it's really, it's really just so good. I can't believe you're nitpicking this. This, this wonderful—.

Nic

Look, we've had so many, uh, mutual 5-star movies, I gotta make sure there's something to pick on about.

Steve

We gotta make sure we really get— dig into everything because this could be one of those.

Nic

Uh, the, the Frank Chong Li fight is pretty entertaining.

Steve

It's good. It's a good fight.

Nic

Again, this is like the best example of Jean-Claude Van Damme only kicks with his right leg.

Steve

I didn't notice that, but now I gotta go back and watch it.

Nic

Yeah, go back and watch it. Uh, every kick he does He does these kicks that I would describe as like foot slaps. Like, he's— it's almost like he's slapping him like an old woman would with like a white glove, like across the face. Uh, he hits him with the world's most telegraphed jump kick to the face. Like, this is all haymakers, this fight. Yes, it's definitely not like little jabs and strategy. It's like an NBA game that's all dunks. It's NBA Jam. Yeah, it's one— dude, totally NBA Jam. Uh, maybe this movie inspired NBA Jam too.

Steve

Might have.

Nic

He kicks Frank at one point. Chong Li comes up from behind him and Frank kicks behind his shoulder, which is like— it's like if a pirate had a parrot on his shoulder, it would be him kicking his own parrot off his own shoulder, right? Like that angle. Like, that's where the guy's face was.

Steve

I feel like we saw a movie where this happens in a clearly comically incorrect way. Like, I was like, one of the— it was like Naked Gun or Airplane or somebody does something like this where like they essentially would've had to fold in half for this to happen.

Nic

Yep.

Steve

I think it was Airplane. I feel like somebody gets crunched in the bed, or I don't remember exactly what it was. Some movie where somebody, yeah, like gets that compressed and yet he— we're supposed to believe, and of course we'll only see him from his chest up, so we don't see the rest of his body, but we're supposed to believe that that foot, which I think would've been his left actually, but goes up.

Nic

Yeah, that's true. In that scene. Yeah.

Steve

And completely, yeah. Like I just don't even understand physically how that would happen.

Nic

Yeah. I don't even understand how your hip rotates to make that happen.

Steve

It doesn't is the key. But even, Even if he got it right, because of like the shin hitting his own body, like maybe the toe just tapped the dude's nose. Like it would have had to be real close. It was like really very strange, right?

Nic

You're giving yourself an incredibly hard kick in the shoulder to maybe graze the guy behind you.

Steve

Let me break my collarbone to see if I can tickle the nose of my opponent. That's the move here.

Nic

But that was a big move. And now Chong Li is down. Yeah. Uh, and he's obviously at a disadvantage, so he reaches in for the 2 Rolaids that were in his, uh, given to him by his trainer. Crushes them and then throws like an incredible amount of powder for those 2 little pills.

Steve

Oh, it was very, very, very, uh, complete crushing. Yeah, yeah, it was very good. And it—.

Nic

Yeah, and the sweat on his hand didn't make it tasty or anything, just perfectly.

Steve

So I don't know if they were just supposed to be chalk discs or something.

Nic

I guess the way I read it described was like salt tablets or something. I don't know. I mean, that would hurt. Used to happen in pro wrestling, right, where they have the guy— and again, it would always be like a Japanese guy, sneaky Japanese guy who's throwing salt in someone's face to blind them. Glitter. He's Korean, Japanese, and Chinese in this.

Steve

It's about par for the course for Bloodsport's cultural awareness.

Nic

Uh, yeah. And he's— so now Frank Dux is blind, and again, no, no ref. Oh, we, we forgot to do the no blinding anybody with foreign objects, uh, rule. Like, damn it, we blew it. Yeah. And he is just giving the most agonized slow-motion scream as Frank's looking around realizing that he can't see. Very incompetent at the beginning at being a blind guy. He's freaking out.

Steve

Well, and, and here's the problem, then they keep cutting to what we're supposed to believe is Frank's vision, and it's not. He can't see. It's just blurry. Like, you still could look at the fucking opponent and see him coming. This is not— you are not in the dark. Like, it's very odd choice. They shouldn't have done that, you know what I mean? Like, I feel like either don't do that or make it—.

Nic

Or do that just at the beginning and show it deteriorating, right?

Steve

Yeah, show it fade to black and then we go, oh, he can't see anything. The way they did it, it's like, oh, he can actually see shapes and colors and movement. Like, why wouldn't he just keep fighting? I get that it's a disadvantage, I'm not wrong, but they make it seem like when we're looking at him, it looks like, yeah, he's completely blind and reacting only to the Force or what the fuck ever, right? But when we get the vision, the shot from his vision, it's like, yeah, it's blurry, it's impaired.

Nic

You still just have to kick like a human-sized thing, so it's not like, yeah, you're not playing darts.

Steve

Right, exactly. Yes, this is not a precision job here. Like, yeah.

Nic

Um, so he's flashing back now to his blindness training that he had with, with Tanaka.

Steve

We gotta be reminded.

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

That he did that.

Nic

Oh, hey, remember, remember an hour and 10 minutes ago, um, when I was serving a full English tea to this family, like, with, with a blindfold on? And he's, and he's flashing back to this. So of course, when he remembers his training, which is the main thing that we need to do, Yeah, is he's able to start doing it right. Blocks a kick immediately, turns it around, starts fighting back. Now Chong Li does a, does a very WWE, WWF style move where he grabs the referee. Oh yeah, throws him in between him and Frank, and Frank has to like grab him and feel him for a minute, right? And then let him go, like, okay, you're okay.

Steve

And like, like defends him momentarily. Yeah, sort of puts him behind himself, which is like partly get out of my way, But like the ref doesn't step away from him at all. He just stays right there.

Nic

That ref is asking to get really hit. And also, if I felt a gi when I'm going against a shirtless guy, I would be pretty quick, like, cool, I'm good, instead of like investigating him.

Steve

There's nothing to grab on Bolo Yeung at this point. He has no shirt on. You wouldn't be grabbing anything.

Nic

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, so we got a lot of slow-motion dodges here, and Frank is, is using his blind training and And getting out of the way, and he's able to turn the tables here on Chang Lee. He puts him in a hold, and he gets Chang Lee to say the the tap out words. Mate, mate. Yep. And and that is it. Well, I mean, this it for that fight.

Steve

Yeah, it's absolutely right. So Frank wins. He is the champion. He's the first American champion of the Kumite. I believe he's given a sword as well, right? Isn't that?

Nic

Yeah, which is never getting through TSA on his way home.

Steve

Well, they'd. There was no TSA back then. Uh, but you know, it's— we then have to cut back to the hospital room to Jackson because he's telling him how he won and, and, you know, all this stuff. And, and they get their whole, you know, anytime you ever need me, I'm there, brother, like kind of, you know, moment. So we know, okay, they're lifelong friends. That's cool. Um, but then he asked, you know, did you beat him? And, and the journalist gets to say— Janice, or whatever— she's like, oh, even better, he made him say mate. She's just so— a moment ago she wanted this whole thing done away with, but now Frank's One, she's a super fan.

Nic

Yeah, freaking front runner, Janet. Yeah. Um, yeah, so then that's it. And, uh, and Dukes is, uh, supposed to now return, uh, with these agents. And I like that Ray Jackson's allowed to just chug beer throughout his recovery at this hospital.

Steve

That must have been Hong Kong standard protocol at the time.

Nic

Dude, it looks nice. Um, and the, the agents are there at the plane, you know, at the bottom of the airplane, said, ah, Dukes is standing us up again. And then he comes out from the door He's like, what took you so long, guys?

Steve

Guys, where are you going? I am right here. It is time for us to go back to America. Like, whatever the fuck his accent is. Yeah.

Nic

So that is Bloodsport.

Steve

And then the most surprising part— Here we go. The entire movie to me, I had no idea that was coming. I had no hint that there was anything about this. The text that shows up over Jean-Claude Van Damme's face when he's doing the little fist and bow kind of thing to Janice saying, Goodbye. I wrote down the whole thing. This is what it says. This motion picture is based on the true events in the life of Frank W. Dux. From 1975 to 1980, Frank W. Dux fought 329 matches. He retired undefeated as the World Heavyweight Full Contact Kumite Champion. Mr. Dux still holds 4 world records: fastest knockout, 3.2 seconds; fastest punch with a knockout, 0.12 seconds; whoa; fastest kick with a 72 miles per hour. Oh, how many seconds was that? Most consecutive knockouts in a single tournament: 56. Hold on to that one. Subsequently, Mr. Dukes founded the first American ninjutsu system, Dukes Ryu. So this is the first problem I have with this, is I saw that and I went, bullshit, there's no way. Yeah, the first number that jumped out at me is insane, is 329 matches in 5 years. Just Like, the most prolific boxers of all time have, like, maybe 100 matches in their entire careers. 40 to 50 is a good career, you know what I mean?

Nic

Yeah.

Steve

Like, so 329 full-contact, no-gloves matches, and yes, over 6 years, supposedly, is just— beggars the imagination. It's ridiculous. But the more interesting one is the 56 consecutive knockouts in a single tournament, because the number of entrants you would need in a tournament in order to have the winner fight 56 people and beat them all, 56 consecutive people, yeah, you would need, and I quote, I did the math, 72 quadrillion, 57 trillion, 594 billion people needed to be in that tournament.

Nic

Oh, so you're saying it's impossible for there to be a popular martial science tournament?

Steve

Something like 9 million Earths worth of people or something. Like, it's absolutely ridiculous. And so yeah, the whole— all of his stuff is just complete bullshit. And of course, the reality of it is like none of it's verifiable. All of it just came from dudes. He told Black Belt magazine that he did this, they printed it, that became the proof that it is real. Yeah, yeah. And so it's still all just based on one guy's claims. Yeah, yeah, really crazy.

Nic

It's so crazy that, um, yeah, 56 in a row. Even if you're— it's like an octuple elimination tournament where you're able to lose and still like fight again.

Steve

The one potential way would be like 56, a round robin of 57 people. Yeah, so everybody has to fight everybody else 56 times. Yeah, but then how do you do that, A, over 3 days, and B, who can serve— who, who other than this impenetrable champion is surviving long enough to fight 56 matches over a few days while getting knocked out at least by Frank Dux, right? It's ridiculous.

Nic

It sounds like a classic liar. And then all the stuff I'd read about Frank Dux is, is he, uh, juiced his military service numbers apparently. You know, there's not, uh, a lot of evidence for the stuff that he's claiming.

Steve

And he kind of was in the reserves, it sounds like. So he did have some connection but never like deployed to Vietnam or anything like that, right? I saw Right.

Nic

So, uh, yeah, just your classic liar. Just the classic kid you went to elementary school with who says that his dog is actually a wolf. Like one of those kind of kids.

Steve

You wouldn't know this tournament, she's in Canada. Like, yeah, yeah. So that, that is Bloodsport. And, uh, it's— that is Bloodsport, Nic.

Nic

That's Bloodsport.

Steve

Yeah. You brought it to us. Give us your rating, buddy. What's going on?

Nic

Okay, so Bloodsport, uh, you know, you have to know why you're going into to watch it, uh, and what you're gonna get out of it. It's a short movie, hour and a half like we said. I think you can trim the first 15 minutes, no problem.

Steve

Oh yeah.

Nic

Um, and, uh, everyone has the option to fast forward through or start later, and I'd say like your experience doing that is going to be more enjoyable. This is almost like— it's interesting to know that the budget was so low.

Steve

Yeah, that's true.

Nic

Because I do feel like this movie would benefit from a modern remake, and not even as like a blockbuster, but just as kind of the level of one of those those like Jason Statham lore release, like The Beekeeper or something that has that kind of budget in it, right? Um, because I think you can get a lot of real, uh, fighters in it. I think you can make it look a lot better, the fight choreography. There's a lot of opportunities to, to improve on it. Um, but it did inspire so much stuff. There's a lot of stuff that wouldn't have existed if Frank Dux wasn't such a successful liar, right? I imagine being an editor, it'd What? Who would lie to Black Belt magazine? The most lied about title in the history of the world. But, you know, Van Damme, yeah, he kind of sucks, but he can do some fun looking stuff. Not, not great acting in this. It's kind of crazy that future Oscar nominee Forest Whitaker was in this. Yeah, right.

Steve

Our second time seeing Mr. Whitaker. Yeah, that's right.

Nic

Fast Times at Ridgemont High.

Steve

Very famous role in Fast Times. Yeah, we haven't seen like a Forest Whitaker movie yet. No, but we'll get there, I'm sure. We've seen him around for sure.

Nic

Um, so I think as far as rating Bloodsport, I'm gonna be similar to how you were with the last film, where I think that if I'm just going straight up, if I didn't have any history with this, if I wasn't giving it credit for like spawning Street Fighter 2 and Mortal Kombat, I'd probably be more like a 2.5. Like, it's just kind of like a stinky low-budget movie with some cool parts. I'm gonna go 3.5 for Bloodsport because I I think that it's a fun watch. If this is your jam, it's a fun one. And if you like action movies, I think it's important to add this to your repertoire of ones you've seen, just because it's influential and it's referenced a lot, even if it's not the greatest experience to watch.

Steve

That's fair. I think that's totally fair. Yeah, I obviously, having watched this for the first time this week, don't have any nostalgia for Bloodsport. However, I do have nostalgia for at least one of the major things that it spawned, which was the sort of 1v1 fighting games that we all loved in the early '90s. '90S, most specifically Street Fighter II and Mortal Kombat, had really specific pulls from this movie that informed their movies, or their games rather. So I have to give it some credit there. Like you, never been a big Van Damme guy. You know, I was pretty much a Schwarzenegger guy when it came to action stars in the '80s and '90s, even more than Stallone and anybody else.

Nic

Well, Arnie, I mean, Arnie is truly the Cadillac of those guys. I mean, Stallone is a significant step down, even though he's clearly the second best one.

Steve

Sure, but he's like a fully loaded Chevy Silverado. Like, it's fine, but it's not, It's not a luxury car, you know what I mean? Like, yeah. But yeah, so I don't have nostalgia for that, but I have nostalgia for some of the resulting art that came out of this existence. I actually was going to give this a 1.5, and I'm gonna bump it up to a 2, 'cause the more I think about how all of this came out of one just absolute pathological liar's bullshit stories, and that he got away with getting this movie made, Yeah. Getting the story told, like, fucking kudos, Frank W. Dukes. It's all bullshit, clearly, but man, you had so many people going for so long and got this movie made, and then that meant this and this. And so I am gonna give it a 2 out of 5.

Nic

Okay.

Steve

That's about it, 'cause I also was thinking about it in the context of Rocky IV. I feel like this is a very, very similar movie. This movie is a series of fights and flashbacks tied loosely together with a plot, which, you know, Rocky IV was more of like montages and fights.

Nic

Yes.

Steve

Right? You know, but same kind of thing where there's not enough plot here. For me to care about the movie part of it, but that's also fine. Like, there's some value here. So I think I was a 1.5 on Rocky. Because of the Street Fighter II and Mortal Kombat influence, some of that stuff, uh, I'm gonna go up to 2 on Bloodsport. So, uh, you were 3.5, so 5.5 out of 10 is where we are with Bloodsport.

Nic

Fair enough. I think that's, that's where it belongs.

Steve

I think that's, that's, that's pretty accurate. Um, but yeah, man, Frank Dux, like, good, good for you.

Nic

Now you know what, my, my YouTube rabbit hole this week is gonna be looking for actual Frank Dux interviews just to see this guy in action. 100%.

Steve

It might be featured on an upcoming episode of the Rewind.

Nic

If I find some good Frank Stukes, I'll share it. Love it.

Steve

Perfect. Cool. All right, so I'm doing next week then. This was—.

Nic

Yeah, what do we got coming up, Steve?

Steve

So we're gonna go do another movie. This was kind of like— I think this will go better than last time, but, but a few weeks ago we did The Birdcage, maybe a month ago now. And that was a movie that is something my wife and I love together and quote together. And I mentioned it in that episode a few times. And come on, Gloria, you whatever, all this stuff. And we're gonna do another movie that's like that. This is something that Heather and I like love. This was actually a movie she introduced me to, I believe. Um, can't remember if I'd never seen it before I started dating her in the early 2000s, but I definitely— if I'd maybe seen it once, it wasn't like an important part of my life. And then she loves it. So she and I started dating in like, uh, 2005. And so from there, I saw this movie a ton of times, and it's now a major thing. We get to go back to the Bay Area, to like the pre-tech boom Bay Area. Oh, it's been a while since we had a Bay Area movie. We had Pacific Heights, we had Sneakers, uh, The Rock, you know, so we've done a few, but now we're gonna go back and do, do another Bay Area movie. Um, and we're gonna see, you know, Mike Myers before he— before Austin Powers and before, you know, ever, but after Wayne's World. So it's sort of like at— I don't even know, right around when Wayne's World came out, actually. I'm not 100% sure exactly the time. We'll have to look at it next week. But So I Married an Axe Murderer. Okay, beating around the bush, we're gonna go— this— he plays like, you know, 2 characters. 2 characters in this one, I think. Just 2. Yeah, he plays— he plays the main character and his own dad, right? And, and yeah, so, so we're gonna go and we're gonna hang out with, uh, with the Scottish family, uh, Charlie's parents and, and his buddy, the, the cop that wishes being a cop was more exciting than it really is. And, you know, there's just all, all these shots of San Francisco from like long before any of the like tech stuff kind of took over.

Nic

Unrealistic locks in this one.

Steve

Oh, absolutely, 100%.

Nic

Can't wait for it.

Steve

Really good Yeah, how 2 roommates afford that crazy apartment in San Francisco even in 1993 or whatever. Right. Wild. So yeah, so, uh, '93, So I Married an Axe Murderer. That's what we'll be watching next week. Awesome. Excellent. That's a wrap. If you like what you hear, please consider heading over to Apple or Spotify and leaving us a 5-star review. It helps new folks find the show. Be sure to check out our website at twodads1movie.com. That's the number 2 and the number 1. There you can explore the movies we've covered, sign up for our newsletter, The Recap, rewind, which we're actually doing these days, and even get sneak previews of upcoming episodes. Once again, this has been Bloodsport, another episode of 2 Dads 1 Movie. I'm Steve.

Nic

And I'm Nic.

Steve

Thank you so much for listening. We'll catch you next week.

Nic

Thanks, everyone.